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Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

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Chapter 121: Letter from Jin Province

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Chapter 121: Letter from Jin Province

Chapter 121: Letter from Jin Province "Wow, I didn't expect, I didn't expect, Qi Long, you can also write rap!" Everyone praised Qi Long after he went on stage. It’s not that we are ignoring the guests, because the guests also have their own stage, and the focus of interviews after the performance is on the guests. Now, we have to give thanks to Qi Long. Sa Beining also talked about another song by Qi Long: "Young China Says" "Qi Long is really good at writing this kind of grand and exciting things. Hey, everyone, it's just right here. Qi Long, please write another passage of "Young China"!" Qi Long was puzzled: "You also bring a counterattack?" Before he could finish, the sound teacher had already played the accompaniment, which was the last part of the song, with the highest pitch. Qi Long holds the microphone: [Young people are naturally wild, my heart is as bright as the sun, no matter how many difficulties I face, I will continue to fight, I am a young man today! ] As Qi Long started singing, the audience in the auditorium also started singing, including the Phoenix band and the challenge team members behind him, who all sang along quietly. [The sky is high and the sea is vast, the Chinese youth are full of vigor and vitality, they work hard to become pillars of society and live up to their youth! ]

"This song is dedicated to all Chinese youth. May our Chinese youth live forever and our country has no borders!" Sa Beining concluded with the original lyrics: "Just like the books we donated to everyone in this event, we hope that they can also learn good knowledge through these books and become pillars of society." "Yes!" Qi Long nodded. Sa Beining turned his head and said, "Don't be a supporting actor anymore. Go down and take a rest! The stage will be handed over to the Phoenix Band!" Qi Long was driven away, and as soon as he got off the stage he took off his Tang suit and changed into a gown. After the Phoenix group ended, it was his crosstalk performance with Dong Qiang. "Madam Shexiang? Never heard of it! An unpopular song?" Dongqiang had already changed into his gown and was puzzled on the side stage. Qi Long glanced at him and said, "You'll have heard it soon!" Phoenix Band, do you have any unpopular songs? Sure enough, half a minute later, Dongqiang, like many other audience members, sang along: [Wumeng Mountain is connected to other mountains, and the moonlight shines on Xiangshui Beach] “Hahahahahaha!” Qi Long said happily, “I’ll use this as a hook for conversation later!” Soon, the Phoenix Band finished singing, and after the interview, the host announced the next program: "Please enjoy the crosstalk "Letter from Shanxi Province", performed by:" Nicometti said this and left the name to Sa Beining. Sa Beining deliberately made a joke: "Qi Delong Dongqiang!" The audience laughed, the lights were temporarily turned off, the staff moved the table up, turned on the surface light, and Qi Longdong stepped forward. "Great!!!" the audience shouted. When there was a skit before, I wondered if there would be crosstalk. Hey, there really was, a surprise within a surprise. It’s hard to buy tickets for Qi Long and Dong Qiang’s crosstalk now. The tickets for their special show went on sale a few days ago, but they were sold out in a few seconds. I can actually hear them here. "Thank you for your enthusiastic cheers. That was the Phoenix Band!" "Correct!" "These two are so popular. Linghua's Liuhu is particularly good, and Zeng Yi's supporting role is also good!" "Eh?" Dong Qiang stopped him: "He is just a singer, he doesn't do Liuhuo, and he doesn't have a supporting role!"

"Who is singing?" Qi Long suddenly started singing. Gao Dongqiang immediately responded: "It's me" "If this isn't a supporting role, what is it?" Qi Long asked back. The audience laughed and Dongqiang nodded: "That's not wrong!" "You two are so popular that you can say that there are no unpopular songs. When 'Lady Shexiang' came out just now, Dongqiang told me that he had never heard of it. Many audiences were also puzzled. After half a minute, they were all there: Wumeng Mountain is connected to other mountains!" Dongqiang also sang along: "The moonlight sprinkles on Xiangshui Beach!" The audience proved that Qi Long was right with their laughter! "Let the two of you go and have a rest. It's our turn to perform now. To be honest, we are also a group!" "Yes, it's Qi Delong Dongqiang." Dongqiang now carried away Sa Beining's bag. Qi Long waved his hand: "No, no, no, our combination is called handsome and compelling, and I am the handsome one!" Dong Qiang subconsciously replied: "Yes, I am the one. What are you talking about!" He reacted and pushed Qi Long, opened the door and took out the bag. "Just kidding, you all know that Dongqiang and I studied in the imperial capital when we were young. Sometimes when our master gave us a holiday, we would go back to Jin Province!" "Yes!" "At that time, I had a friend from Shanxi Province who was much older than me. It was like meeting an old friend in a foreign land. He was a bicycle repairman, about 20 years older than me, but we became sworn brothers. He often invited me to dinner. One time when I went over, he said that there was another friend who hadn't come. There were no mobile phones at that time, and there was no telephone in the compound where he lived. He asked me to wait for a while, drew a picture for him, and asked his apprentice to send it over." It was originally a traditional joke, not a crosstalk show, so the two of them got into the act quickly and didn't say much to fill in the gaps. Qi Long began to imitate, saying that he drew a little man with one hand covering his mouth, bending over and the other hand covering his hips, and then gave the painting away. "Wait a moment. Do you need to send a letter to invite someone to dinner? Can't you just shout?" "No, his friend has hearing problems and can't hear what he's saying!" "He asked his apprentice to deliver a letter, which was quickly returned. It had a picture of a giant turtle locked in a birdcage. When my eldest brother saw it, he said, 'OK, let's eat!'" Dong Qiang was puzzled: "Wait a minute, can you explain what you mean? Drawing a person and a turtle?" Qi Long explained to him that his brother could not write so he drew, and this man was hunched over with one hand covering his mouth and the other hand covering his back, which meant: I will treat you to dinner in the afternoon! "Wow, it's so advanced?" Dongqiang was surprised: "Holding a turtle in a birdcage?" "A turtle has a big shell, which is called a big cover in the Jin dialect. What does it mean that the turtle's big shell can't get out of the birdcage? It probably can't get out!" Dongqiang was shocked again: "Wow, this is high-tech!" This is the content of "Letters from Shanxi Province". A person who cannot write writes letters to his family by drawing pictures, and guessing what the pictures mean. It uses the dialect of Shanxi Province, a timid and narrative crosstalk. In this type of crosstalk, the supporting actor usually does not interfere, nor can he add too many fragmented jokes, as that would affect the overall narrative. So Dongqiang praised in a proper way, while Qilong spoke in a vivid and descriptive way. It is said that one day Qi Long was granted leave by his master to go home to visit his parents, so he asked his eldest brother if he needed anything. His eldest brother drew a picture and gave him fifty yuan to send to his family. Of course I have to help my brother, so Qi Long got in the car. "It's boring in the car. Dongqiang's family went to Hainan for a trip, and I'm alone. If Dongqiang was here, we could chat and practice crosstalk. Without him, I'm bored all day and all night!"

“The trains were slow back then!” "What should I do? I didn't bring a book or a game console, eh?" Qi Long held the fan pretending to be a "letter" and his eyes lit up. An audience member who was familiar with this segment chimed in: “Open the letter!” "Look, I thought the same thing at the time!" “How wicked!” Describing the contents of the letter, there were seven camels lying upside down on the ground, two flies on a tree, four big turtles nearby, and two wine jugs. "What does this mean?" "I don't know either. Let's ask when we get it!" After arriving at the other person's house, Qi Long handed over the letter and the money together. The old man took a look and knew that they were sworn brothers. "How can you tell?" Dong Qiang wondered. Qi Long asked him: "Dong Qiang, you are from Jin Province, what are the five people from Jin Province?" "consistent!" "Six?" “One string!” "Seven?" "One!" Dongqiang reacted: "Oh, seven in one, but how did the brother come about?" This is Qi Long and Dong Qiang’s personal adaptation of "Family Letters from Shanxi Province". Since Dong Qiang is from Shanxi Province, it is reasonable to ask him about the Shanxi dialect. "Think about the camel's posture!" Qi Long said with a smile that you know. Dongqiang was shocked: "You're calling me brother when you stick your hump on the ground?" "Nonsense, a serious painting won't pass the review!" Let’s talk about the other side of the story. In the Shanxi dialect, flies are called “yingzi”, which means silver, so two flies represent giving money. Lying on the tree represents money (tree). How much? Four turtles, four times eight equals thirty-two, two wine jugs, twenty-nine equals eighteen, add up to fifty dollars, no more, no less! Dong Qiang acted as if he was shocked: "How can this be possible? If you can't read, you should remember the multiplication table!" "Of course not. He makes a living by repairing bicycles!" In reply, the old man and Qi Long each drew a picture of their brother's wife. "Oh no, I forgot to bring my book again. I don't have any books or game consoles. I'm so bored, eh?" "Open the letter!" This time a large part of the audience joined in! "I think so too!"

In the reply letter, the old man's reply was two upside-down buckets with flies on them. There were also big and small circles drawn on them. There was a firecracker in the big circle and a silkworm in the small circle. My sister-in-law's reply was full of content. A piece of lotus root was broken, but it was still connected by a thread. Next to the lotus root was a very small piece of charcoal. There are two pigeons, a duck, and an elephant with a knife wrapped in its trunk killing a goose painted on the side. "What is going on?" Dongqiang was confused again. Qi Long nodded: "I only know that the fly is silver, I don't understand anything else. I was thinking at the time, you said I would draw something, how could he guess it?" "You lack great virtue!" "I drew a self-portrait on the side, waving fifty yuan in my hand and holding a cigarette in my mouth! I went to find my brother with the letter." The audience is looking forward to the answer to the mystery just planted. "What else is a bucket called in Jin Province? Dongqiang?" "Water scoop!" "Hey, the water bucket fell over, but there is still silver?" "The money has been delivered!" Dong Qiang was shocked: "Is that what you mean?" Qi Long nodded and went on to say that the big circle is the rice bowl, the small circle is the tea bowl, there are silkworms in the tea bowl, the silkworms can spin silk, so it is the tea thought, the firecrackers in the rice bowl went off, so it is the rice sound. On the other side, the sister-in-law touched the brother's heart, the lotus root was broken, that was the long thread, and the small charcoal next to it was the short charcoal, long thoughts and short sighs! "What are two pigeons and a duck?" "I told my brother that it was his wife who called him: Brother, brother!" "The elephant killed the goose?" "I want to die!" "Oh, in Jin Province dialect, it means you want me to die!" Dong Qiang explained. Qi Long pointed at the open fan and said, "What I'm most curious about is how he will explain this self-portrait of mine. I said, 'brothers, what does this mean?'" "How did he say?" "Oh, this is my son who took fifty yuan from home to buy cigarettes and took it from me?" Qi Long suddenly reacted and pointed at himself. "You've become someone else's son!" Dong Qiang pointed at Qi Long. The two men took a step back and bowed, and the crosstalk ended. It’s a traditional piece, but many people at the scene have never heard it before, and some who have heard it have forgotten it. It sounds fresh too, and most importantly, it’s free! "it is good!" Jinzi has a particularly good version (not the live version, the live version is not available now.)   (End of this chapter)

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