Chapter 307 – Hero saving a Damsel in distress
In the next few days, no matter if he was having a meal or simply conversing, Tan Tan would constantly maintain his expression within the realms of extreme shock.
Without much stirring, he would abruptly gasp and exclaim, “Woah! Master!”
This led Meng Chao Ran to a stage that whenever he heard the two words, ‘Woah! Master’, he would instantly get a headache. A terribly splitting headache.
Finally, after days that seemed like years, Meng Chao Ran finished the entire stretch of Ice Mirror Mountain. He was about to heave a sigh of relief before realising that Tan Tan was brazenly persisting in his ruckus.
Words couldn’t describe the bitterness in Meng Chao Ran.
Even the Heavenly Chi Gathering Fish in Tan Tan’s bosom had rolled over the water surface, with its white belly facing upwards……it, too, couldn’t endure the vanity and shamelessness of this.
After just exiting Ice Mirror Mountain, clashes of combat could suddenly be heard. With his abundance of experience, Meng Chao Ran instantly clamped over Tan Tan’s mouth before approaching the source stealthily.
After making a bend round a mountain cliff, they immediately saw a young maiden, dressed in cyan clothing, battling intensely with a strange looking three-headed great serpent. Clenched within the young maiden’s right hand was a shimmering longsword; and held within her left hand was a sparkling short dagger. Her fighting style was valiant as she actually clashed evenly, force to force, with the three-headed great serpent!
When Meng Chao Ran and Tan Tan encroached in, the battle was already nearing its climax.
“Three-Headed Blackbone Serpent!” Meng Chao Ran was able to recognize this spirit beast species of the Cang Lan Battlefront with one look. Although it was only of a Third Grade Spirit Beast level, the serpent essence-core inside the three heads of this Three-Headed Blackbone Serpent was indeed a rare medicine to come by.
It seemed like this young maiden was adept in dealing with this Three-Headed Blackbone Serpent, as she inflicted cuts and bruises all over the Three-Headed Blackbone Serpent.
As Tan Tan observed on, his mouth unknowingly formed into an ‘O’ shape. Yet this time, it was without a tinge of purposeful intent, and he was genuinely astonished.
This young lady doesn’t appear much older than me…..how is she so powerful?
What Tan Tan wasn’t aware of was that with his current cultivation base, if he were to deal with this Three-Headed Blackbone Serpent on his own, it wouldn’t pose much of a threat.
“Master……that lady is really beautiful……” Tan Tan swung himself round to glance vacantly at his master with a shocked expression, “She is too strong! I like her……look at her rounded chest and buttocks……”
Meng Chao Ran was utterly speechless.
Truthfully speaking, apart from her outstanding chest and buttocks which Tan Tan had highlighted, Meng Chao Ran could not tell where else her beauty came from. In fact, she appeared rather ordinary……
Yet Tan Tan was spot on about one thing – she was really strong! Such indomitable showing, even an exceptional sturdy brute would find it hard to execute such moves……yet this young lady was actually able to exhibit it without blinking.
Her saliva splattered as she fought, “……..Evil beast! Aren’t you kneeling for this granny yet?! Just donate your brains to me…….vile beast! Simply disgusting……”
“She does possess a sort of violent adorability.” Meng Chao Ran muttered to himself.
Yet his discipled failed to answer him, causing him to turn around, only to see Tan Tan ogling at that young lady with widened eyes and a dropped jaw, he was totally out of it……..
Poor little Tan Tan, love at first sight……
“Perhaps……” Meng Chao Ran felt slightly astonished.
Their fighting tempo was something narrative could not keep up with. Suddenly, the Three-Headed Blackbone Serpent seemed to understand its perilous situation and roared furiously. Slapping its tail against the ground, it shot viciously towards that young lady, attempting to take her down with a suicidal charge!
“Ah!” The young lady yelped in shock and berated the snake, “Your granny! You filthy and stinky snake! Shameless snake! Let me warn you, you have successfully enraged this granny here……”
Boom! A collision between human and a snake; the Three-Headed Blackbone serpent widened its three mouths in unison, ruthlessly chomping down.
“Not good!” In that split second, Meng Chao Ran failed to pull back Tan Tan from anxiously lunging forward, “Beauty……I’m coming to save you, hahaa……”
A hero saving a damsel in distress, this was a term Tan Tan had heard from Chu Yang before.
When a hero rescues a beauty, she will be deeply moved by the hero and harbour this newfound affection quietly within her heart. Then when romance is ignited, she will pour her heart’s devotion, and…….this achievement will be spoken of throughout all eternity!
Such a perfect fairytale was Tan Tan’s lifelong dream. Today, he was finally presented with the opportunity. Moreover, it was even a girl that captivated his heart on first sight…….how would Tan Tan not sprint fast?
Naturally, that young lady had a method of dealing with this snake. At the instance the serpent pounced forward, her short dagger surged out from her hand and deeply impaled into one of the serpent’s throat. Simultaneously, her longsword glittered with a smooth demeanor and drilled all the way till the sword shaft into the next Serpent’s mouth, as blood drizzled in all directions.
Stealing out from her bosom, she was about to unleash a short dagger against the final serpent head. Instead, she suddenly heard Tan Tan’s shouting.
One had to admit that Tan Tan’s voice was indeed frighteningly sonorous; a resounding booming that resembled a crashing gong mixed with the quacking of a male duck and a female wolf’s howl. His voice instantly startled the young lady and threw her into disarray as her movement slowed down by a thread; causing her to be tightly constricted by the Three-Headed Blackbone serpent.
“Where did this scumbag come from! What is he shouting for?!” The young lady cursed in mournful indignation, as she braced her remaining free hand to shield against the final incoming serpent head.
The Three-Headed Blackbone serpent had suffered two fatal strikes and its life was on the verge of crumbling. However, this triggered its rampant madness as it strove to chomp this woman to death, even if it should perish.
But right in the nick of time, Tan Tan arrived!
One slash!
Shua!
A cleanly severed serpent head was beheaded to the ground!
“Not that one, this one!” The young lady was seemingly about to vomit blood.
Is this an idiot? He couldn’t tell this is the real danger?
“Oh!” Tan Tan bluntly replied as he roared loudly again and unleashed his blade!
Blade rays as smooth as water!
Another already dead serpent head was cleaved off and fell to the dust!
“Fuck me!” The young lady exploded with a commonly used male slur in her delirious franticism. Clenching her teeth with saliva splattering, she reprimanded, “This one, you swine!!!”
“There should be a sequence!” Tan Tan fumed back. “Stop making such a fuss!”
Meanwhile in Tan Tan’s heart; This woman really cannot differentiate good from bad….this handsome brother is here to save you, but instead you call me a swine! Thinking in this manner, he nearly lost his desire to save her.
This was the first time encountering a Three-Headed Blackbone Serpent, how would Tan Tan know which head was already dead? In his perspective, the young lady was shielding against one head with her bare hand while the remaining two seemed dangerously treacherous; thus, he decided to behead them first…….
The young lady summoned her strength and defied the last serpent head, she was already prematurely heaving sighs of relief in her heart.
Since this dude had already chopped off the other two heads, this one will be his next right?
Yet what she couldn’t anticipate was that after holding for a long while, nothing happened. Feeling as though she could no longer support anymore, she swung her head in furious anger, only to see a youngster contentedly spectating from the side. Observing that young lady turning towards him, the youngster cheered loudly and in great spirits, “Go girl! You can do it!”
Nothing under the heavens could surpass her current indignation!
“Ughhh” The young lady who was already unable to hold on, immediately fainted from anger.
The only notion flashing past her mind before she fainted was; This granny definitely wasn’t bitten to death by this Three-Headed Blackbone Serpent, neither was I poisoned to death. Today, I died in anger by this this repulsive bastard, that cannot do anything but harm…….
In my next life…..if this old woman doesn’t torment him to death, my surname is not called Xie…….
Once she fainted, her hand turned limpid allowing the serpent head to bare down on her.
Tan Tan was finally enlightened; Oh fuck, so she was referring to this head……
He hastily surged forward with a yell.
Shua!
His blade descended along with the remaining serpent head, before Tan Tan casually kicked the serpent head away.
“Aren’t you going to hurry and rescue her?!” Meng Chao Ran
“Right right right……” Tan Tan answered repetitively as he shifted the young lady away from the serpent carcass. This serpent had a superfluous and thick body, causing Tan Tan to drool while shifting her, “Ze ze, what a fatty…….”
(TN: Ze ze is the sound effects of him clicking his tongue.”
Who knew if he was calling the person or the snake fat……
After a long drawn out time, the young lady woke up, The breeze rustled against her face, sobering her up immediately, “I’m not dead?”
“Of course you aren’t dead! It was me who rescued you.” A strange voice answered her.
The young lady spun round in reaction to that voice, and instantly saw a ‘shocked’ face gazing at her.
Eh? This persons face and that crooked eyebrow fella aren’t the same person
Plop!
The young lady bounced up and hatefully exclaimed, “Where’s that scumbag from before?”
Tan Tan asked in ‘astonishment’, “What scumbag?”
“That scumbag who killed the snake!” The young lady stamped her feet as she scanned her eyes around in search.
“There’s no scumbag!” The ‘shocked’ Tan Tan replied.
“He left?” The young lady inquired.
“Nope!” The ‘astounded’ Tan Tan replied.
“Then where is he?” This young lady was starting to feel queer.
This is just a normal conversation, what is with your constantly shocked demeanour?
“He is right here!” Tan Tan proclaimed with ‘indescribable shock’, “I am him!”
“Urgh oh…..” Weird choking notes spewed out from the young lady’s throat, her eyes widening as she glared at him.
“What are you looking at? “ Tan Tan asked in shock.
“It obviously isn’t you….” The young lady frowned.
“It is me!” Tan Tan persisted with his shock countenance. “Miss, I saved you…..it really was me.”
The young woman was on the verge of crumbling as she helplessly pronounced. “You saved me……but why are you so shocked?”
Tan Tan answered brazenly with shock. “Young lady, don’t you find me particularly dashing?”
“Where’s the snake?” The young lady was thoroughly defeated as she changed the topic. At this point, she had already been extremely disturbed by such a perplexing expression that she had actually forgotten her rage.
“Over there!” Tan Tan replied. “I even helped you to vent some air just now……”
“Ah ah ah……” the young lady finally witnessed three badly mutilated serpent heads. “You you……”
“That’s correct! It is me!” Tan Tan bragged with awe and shock. “Just a mere stinky snake and it dared to harm you……so I smashed it…..”
“Heavens…….oh lord……” The young lady implored as she stomped her feet in grief and indignation, “Kill me….just kill me…..what kind of freak have I encountered…..”
“Isn’t it just a snake, lady? Don’t need to get so worked up. Although it had three heads, it was still just a snake, not a dog.” The startled Tan Tan explained.
“I’m going to kill you, ahhhh…..” The young lady lept up and pounced against Tan Tan like a roaring tigress, her hands firmly clutching his neck as he rocked him with wild insanity, “You swine! Swine! You smashed the serpent’s head…..you actually smashed its heads…….why do you think I exhausted all my strength in slaying it?”
Being choked until his tongue dangled out, Tan Tan’s shocked expression instantly vanished. “Gurggh urgghh urggh…….woman, ughr urgh gurggh…..I waf wrung?”
Dedition: Well, this is your last chapter of the week hehe. Hope you enjoy it. Have a nice weekend you beautiful muggles. \o/