“He grows up to be a menace, you know?”
Her voice rang in his ears, and perhaps throughout the entire planet as well. It was chilliny, but contained warmth. It was as if, instead of being angry that Alan had failed… She was happy, exhilarated even.
She was not disappointed at him failing her quest, but overjoyed.
Alan, however did not catch on to her joy as of this moment, his mind was still preoccupied.
Lanesha took the baby from him, and cradled it. The child played with her fingers, as her voice dictated his cruel future.
“He becomes a fallen angel, a demon of infamous repute, one that brought an end to many, many planets. He rose to become one of the 72, those who govern the Abyss, and causes destruction throughout the universe.”
Alan’s eyes did not leave the baby, who continued to play with Lanesha’s fingers.
… Something that cute, that loveable would turn into such a cruel monster?
He didn’t doubt her words, in fact, he knew they were nothing but the cold, hard truth. Lanesha had lived through the disastrous future where Aranus, under the control of the abyss rampaged.
Not once, not twice, not even thrice, but five hundred and fifty four times.
So her words, filled with dreadful memories of the chaos that would ensue were nothing but true.
“But…”
But did that mean, he would be left speechless, unable to answer of the deeds of that baby?
No.
Lanesha did indeed talk of the future, but she talked of an insignificant part of it.
Or rather, a changeable part of it.
“But… Won’t those planets still die? When… You know what happens..”
He was unable to say what it was, he simply couldn’t. Whenever he tried to describe the destruction he saw in his nightmares, the figures of supreme beings falling like dies, The black dragon wrecking havoc…
He was always afraid. Fear always gripped his heart whenever he even thought of it.
Just like the hearts of the Supremes, he felt the same fear.
But Alan was different from the Supremes, his thinking was shallow and molded by the vicious sights. He only knew fear and inevitability. He did not know how to fight back, not truly.
“Yes, but entire generations would still thrive until that accursed future that which is truly inevitable comes. Killing him now, will save millions, if not billions.”
She did not stop, she awakened the feelings inside of Alan with her words and was ruthless in her approach.
“Millions would cry, billions would die, becoming nothing more than a memory.” “But…”
“But? A simple but is all that stops you from stopping it all? Don’t you want to fight back?”
He paused. He turned his head down in shame. The baby, sensing it, started to cry.
But Lanesha spared no effort in trying to calm the baby down, she was still ruthless with his words.
“You are not afraid of the inevitability that we are, that we tried to desperately change. You are not afraid of the Abyss, not of Aranus. You are not afraid of our bane.”
He grit his teeth, and his nails dug into his palms. But he couldn’t say anything, he knew where Lanesha was bringing it.
“Your afraid of the possibility that your entire life is planned for you. That your not living of your own whims, but because of another. You feel as if the feelings you develop for others, the love for one, and the caring for another are all fake, they are planted in you, for a purpose you fear is so different from what you think, from what you want it to be!”
He couldn’t respond.
“See? You can’t even respond because you know it is the truth. For gods sake Alan! Even if it just became the truth, I always considered you my son, you are grandson of a primordial being! Your destined to become a supreme! Perhaps even above! Yet your afraid of the mere possibility that everything you do is fake, everything you feel is fake!”
She took a deep breath, her posture relaxed a little bit. But her gaze did not recede.
“Your afraid of a possibility! Not an inevitability you claim to be afraid of.”
But then, a sorrowful expression appeared on her face, as she came to the realization that she had been too harsh on him.
“I… ”
She waited a bit to find the correct words to say, and slowly eased her expression.
“I know James better than anyone. You may… Have been created by him but I can assure you, what you think of, it does not exist.”
She finally stopped, and ironically, as if the baby sensed the tension, stopped crying and simply looked at Alan.
It smiled a little, and it somehow warmed his steel heart.
“…”
Finally mustering the courage to speak, he said.
“I’m not afraid of it. I’m not afraid of what you think I am.”
Lanesha raised her brows, gesturing for him to speak.
“I know what you said, may be true. But that is not what im afraid of. I let that go a long time ago, I simply don’t care about it.”
It was true, he had let that fear of his go, he was dwelling in his own delusions at that time, fueled by his tired mind, the nightmares had taken a toll on him.
He didn’t deny that he used to think like that, but he overcame it.
The fear, that perhaps whatever he thought he did out of his own will wasn’t even his own will. He ‘was’ just made to think that way…
“I won’t deny that you know him well, I also know that bastard, so I know that he… As much
as I hate to admit it, or even don’t beleive in it much… freeweɓnovel.cѳm
A part of me knows that he isn’t focused on something so yribial.”
Lanesha’s gaze softened, as she heard Alan declare his own will and thought as something trivial.
“I… Know when he is manipulating me, I have some knowledge of it. So I know I have to face him someday or not… What I am afraid of is not that my every action now is controlled by
him…”
Lanesha’s eyes widened, as she finally realized.
“I’m afraid that when I finally win against him, which I will do, no matter what… That…”
He stopped for a while, considering his words carefully.
“That my every action after his death would just be me completing what he wants… His grand
fucking scheme.”
He moved a little closer to Lanesha, albeit a bit forcefully. His feet dove into the stone floor,
shattering it.
“He called me his masterpiece! What is that supposed to mean?!”
Frustrated, he called out.
“What was even the point of this slaughter? Why did I hesitate? Why am I called his
masterpiece? Just what is it that makes me so? Why do I have to be careful not to use my first prowess so that I may not awaken an ancient horror? That’s also being fucking kept at bay by that bastard? Why did he narrate this entire future like a fucking novel? Focusing on Elijah,
instead of Aranus?
Why?”
Questions, he was simply filled with questions. And not enough answers.
“Why did I even hesitate to even kill these fucking bugs?! I know when it’s him messing with
me… So what the fuck was it? What was wrong with me?”
Lanesha spoke.