Kyle left the town and walked towards the outside world.
But then, he suddenly stopped as he saw a small mountain.
‘Hm, I wonder,’ Kyle thought.
For just a moment, he stopped.
Silence.
‘Nope, he’s not complaining,’ Kyle thought.
“So, Boss,” Kyle said.
“Dangerous,” Theodor said.
“I mean, yeah, probably, but impossible?” Kyle asked.
“Depends on your goal.”
“Well, what if I just take a teensy-weensy look and get a bit of ore?” Kyle asked.
“Then, not impossible,” Theodor answered evenly.
Kyle furrowed his brows as he scratched his chin in thought.
Naturally, Kyle was looking at the entrance to Theodor’s Inheritance Crypt.
He still remembered how that weird stone dog dragon thing escorted him through the different caves filled with valuable ore.
There was a lot of cash buried in that mountain.
Kyle really liked cash.
‘Later,’ he thought. ‘I told everyone I would be back quick. Also, I think I should prepare more.’
‘Usually, I don’t know what kind of opponent I am going to face, but this time, I roughly know what I’m facing.’
‘A bunch of Ore Fiends and Ferocious Beasts with Earth and Metal Affinities.’
‘Gotta need speed and power. They are most likely rather slow and hard, but their offensive powers should be strong.’
‘Blocking attacks won’t work.’
‘I mean, if I had a shield, I could totally block some attacks, but then, how will I swing my hammer?’
‘I need more arms.’
“Hey, Boss, can I get more arms?” Kyle asked.
Theodor needed a moment to digest this strange question.
“No,” he said with annoyance.
“Why not?” Kyle asked.
“What a stupid question,” Theodor answered with a snort.
“How am I supposed to know what I can or cannot do?” Kyle asked. “I can summon wind, fire, and metal, but I can’t have more arms? Why not? Why can’t I have more arms?”
“The world doesn’t work like that!” Theodor shouted. “You can’t just grow more arms!”
“Says who?” Kyle asked.
“The natural order!” Theodor answered. “Only beasts can do that!”
“Wait a second, beasts can grow more limbs?” Kyle asked in surprise.
Theodor snorted. “Yes.”
“Then, why am I not seeing a ton of amalgamations of limbs and shit?” Kyle asked.
“You ate a sizable singular tentacle growing out of the head of a shrimp less than a day ago,” Theodor commented.
“It wasn’t born that way?” Kyle asked.
“Of course not!” Theodor shouted.
“So, it just got a tentacle at some point?” Kyle asked.
Kyle heard Theodor taking a deep breath, which was strange since he was literally just a stone.
“During a Realm Advancement, beasts can change their forms to a certain degree, but they rarely do that. Most of the time, they just grow bigger,” Theodor explained.
“Why?” Kyle asked.
“More is not automatically better, imbecile,” Theodor said. “If that shrimp hadn’t had the tentacle, would it be easier or harder to kill?”
Kyle blinked a couple of times. “Probably harder since it would have claws. Wait a second! Was it born with or without claws?”
“Chances are high that it was born with claws,” Theodor said.
“Then, why didn’t it have claws?” Kyle asked.
“More is not better,” Theodor said. “More weapons means your mass and Ether get spread over a bigger area. Your Ether will not be as dense, which will weaken your speed, offense, and defense.”
“The shrimp you keep talking about probably exchanged its claws for a tentacle for exactly that reason.”
“Hey!” Kyle answered. “You brought the shrimp up first!”
“It doesn’t matter who brought it up! You’re wasting my time with this nonsense!” Theodor shouted.
“Wasting your time? What am I keeping you from? What’s so important that you have to stop the conversation and go somewhere else? You got a meeting with some of the pebbles on that mountain?” Kyle asked.
Kyle could feel Theodor getting angry, but that didn’t say much.
He was always angry.
“Sooooo,” Kyle slowly said. “Why do so few beasts not change their looks?”
“Did you not understand the simple metaphor I gave you?” Theodor asked with an arrogant snort.
“No,” Kyle said, even though he understood the metaphor. “Explain it in dwarf, please.”
Kyle could feel Theodor’s disgust.
“Many weapon bad. How use weapon much? Weapon in way of weapon. Big but weak. Feel bad. Instinct say no.”
“Was that dumb enough for you?” Theodor asked.
Kyle nodded. “It appears that the phylogenetically inherited proclivities of their ancestral lineage likely initiated attempts at somatic reconfiguration. However, such endeavors proved maladaptive, thereby entrenching an evolutionary bias toward ontogenetic trajectories characterized by minimal ecological and physiological risk. Cumulative empirical data consistently corroborates the hypothesis that exogenous manipulation of an organism’s endogenous biological architecture disproportionately engenders maladaptive outcomes relative to adaptive benefits.”
Silence.
“Are you trying to sound smart?” Theodor asked with annoyance after two seconds. “Is it working?” Kyle asked, hopeful.
“If the other party doesn’t know anything,” Theodor answered. “How did you even learn all of these words?”
“Sulfur gave them to me,” Kyle said. “Whenever I want to say something, weird and fancy words pop into my head.”
Theodor snorted but didn’t say anything.
He knew what Kyle meant since Theodor had been the one who bought the mirror Kyle had used.
It was created to make dwarves easier to command during the war.
Sadly, it was a bit expensive to use, which was why normal dwarves didn’t get the privilege of fancy vocabulary.
Although, even if they knew fancy vocabulary, they would only be able to understand the words. They would still not be able to formulate complex sentences.
They would just say stuff like, “Dwarf requires nourishment,” instead of, “I want food.”
Same message. Same complexity. Just different words.
But hey, at least they wouldn’t keep asking what words meant.
Kyle had done the same thing.
He effectively just said, “their ancestors probably tried to change their bodies, but it didn’t work well. That’s why their instincts now prefer safer ways to grow. Time has shown that changing biology unnaturally usually causes more harm than good.”
Just fancy.
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