Everyone exited Sister’s dormitory room, and only three people were left, namely, Mary, Sister, and me. Sitting on wooden chairs, silence filled the room once the door closed. To break the ice, one of us must utter a word, and someone did it before everyone else could.
“Sister…”
Converting my guilt to courage, I steeled my back and first spoke to Sister. Even though I had called her out sincerely, she still did not waste an effort to look me in the eye. Although she was like that outwardly, I knew that she was going to listen to me, probably.
“….What’s on your mind, my little brother of mine?”
Still averting her gaze from me, Sister had given me permission to speak my mind. By having that opportunity, I seized that moment and intoned my honest and sincere feelings for Sister.
“…Sister, I am very sorry for everything that I have done to you…”
“…”
“The more I think about my deeds and realize how I have been hurting you, the more I loathe myself.”
“…”
My sister remained silent and still had no response to my words. But no matter what, I wanted to hear at least a word from her, even if she said she could not forgive me anymore.
“I know I am the one wrong here. Mary did nothing wrong. I was the one who pushed her to fulfill my selfishness. So please don’t hate her for the things she hasn’t done.”
“Young Master…”
After I said that, I stood up from my seat and bent my knees. I then rested my right kneecap and submitted myself to Sister.
“So this is me swallowing my pride. Kneeling before you and begging for your forgiveness. I know it will be hard, but I hope that you will provide your response.”
“Young Master! You don’t need to go that far! I am at fault too, so please don’t do that!” .
“I need to, Mary.”
“But…”
Mary suddenly stood up and burst out upon seeing how I lowered myself. But once she recognized that her words could not reach me and were ineffective, she silently went back to her seat.
“Raphael…”
For the first time, Sister uttered a word by calling out my name, which made me raise my head up and look at her. She slowly turned her head and then eventually made eye contact with our purple gazes.
“I want you to know that I actually don’t know how to deal with myself. Should I be mad at you? Or should I let my wrath destroy you? But right now, I chose to control myself and wanted to deal with this matter calmly, as I didn’t want to cause damage. So you better not piss me off and answer my questions honestly.”
“I understand, Sister.”
She really settled herself down and wanted to deal with it peacefully instead of furiously confronting me, which was what I was grateful for. For her utmost peace and satisfaction, I absolutely had to not make her mad.
“Very well, Raphael, you may go back to your seat now.”
“Thank you, Sister.”
Upon hearing her benevolent words, I stood up and sprawled on my seat. She then lowered her head to let out a sigh. Her eyes became more serious when our eyes met anew.
“Why did you have to show those nights to me? You could have done it without showing them to me.”
Recently, I spent nights with Mary in my own bed and streamed each of our conferences live to Sister. There were four nights in total, and Sister had to suffer four times as well.
I wanted to be more honest with everyone, so I told Mom and Mother about the details of it and looked up their advice. However, they gave me crispy slaps and a lethal lower cut from Mother instead of telling me that what I did was wrong and disrespectful.
I was aware that a woman’s heart was fragile and should not break. But I completely ignored that fact just for my own satisfaction and enjoyment of my sister’s suffering. So I took all the blows from my parents since I kind of deserved it.
“That is a hard question to answer, but I must respond. Actually, I have something I desire. In order to achieve that, I have to show that footage to you.”
“And what have you desired?”
“It was to…”
“To what?”
“I want to take revenge on you. A retribution to make you suffer for all the hard things you have done to me.”
“Just for that silly reason…?”
Upon hearing my explanation, Sister got pissed off and twitched. But as she said, she later managed to contain her anger and calmed down eventually.
“I know it was outrageous, and I know it definitely hurt you a lot. But I truly regret what I have done, and I am ready to suffer the consequences of my actions. Please, Sister, I’ll do whatever you want if it’s the only way to fix our relationship.”
“…”
“Please, Sister, tell me what I should do.”
Sister lowered her head, which made her forelocks cover her eyes. She went silent, and I could not make her speak even with my pleas.
“…You said you would do anything, right?”
After a moment, she mumbled behind her shiny, black veils. I responded, “Yes, as long as it is within my capabilities.” She then slowly raised her head and gazed at me.
“There is only one thing that I want you to do for me. If you are that desperate to have my forgiveness, I am sure you will do it.” She smiled.
What was that? It felt like she was thinking about something in her mind that was probably nearly impossible for me to do. But no matter what that would be, I must comply with that request of hers if I really want her to be my sister or more.
“I will do my best, Sister.”
As soon as I said that, I bowed my body deeply before Sister. I did not do it halfheartedly, of course, I have been completely sincere with my actions since then.
“I’ll let you slide for now. But we aren’t finished yet, Raphael, and I am still mad at you.”
“I know.” I said as I yielded both hands in the air.
“Hmph! Now, get out of here. I have something to talk about with Mary alone. And don’t ever dare to peek at us.”
“I got it, Sis.” I stood up, approached the door, and opened it. “Thank you very much, and I am terribly sorry.” I apologized and then slowly closed the door.