Chapter 615: As If a Knife Was Piercing One’s Heart
She had known Qi Haoran since she was nine years old and married him when she was 14. They had known each other for nine years. Did the seven-year itch come early, or did it come two years later?
Mu Yangling sat on the couch in a daze.
Initially, Qi Haoran only felt a sense of danger because Mu Yangling didn’t trust him very much and he didn’t trust himself much either. After questioning her angrily, he became nervous. He carefully touched Mu Yangling’s hand and said, “Don’t be angry. It was just a fleeting thought. No, I didn’t think that way. It’s just a fleeting thought sometimes. I don’t plan to do that.”
Mu Yangling remained silent.
Qi Haoran sighed and scratched his head in frustration. In the end, he could only sit beside Mu Yangling and stare at her blankly.
Little Bear, who had been cast to the back of their minds, turned his head left and right. In the end, he decided he was furious and slapped Qi Haoran’s face, eyes filled with anger. As he punched his father, he turned to look at his mother. Seeing that his mother did not react, he even went forward and grabbed Mu Yangling’s hand to slap Qi Haoran’s face.
Seeing the anxious expression on Little Bear’s face, Mu Yangling’s heart ached. She opened her arms and hugged him, coaxing him in a low voice, “Mother is fine. Mother is fine.”
Anxious, Qi Haoran grabbed Mu Yangling’s hand and slapped it upon his face. “Ah Ling, I was spouting nonsense. Really, those thoughts merely flashed through my mind briefly in my dreams. I usually don’t even think about it.”
Qi Haoran felt a little regretful. Perhaps he shouldn’t have quarreled with her in the first place. This way, he wouldn’t have involuntarily revealed that thought.
Just as this thought rose in his mind, Mu Yangling said, “The most realistic thoughts are the ones a person has in their dreams.” She said, “You don’t have to be vexed about having said those things. Since you already have such a thought, even if you don’t show it this time, I’d notice it next time.”
… Could it be that Ah Ling could read minds?
Mu Yangling carried Little Bear and walked out. Seeing this, Qi Haoran became anxious and spread his arms to block her way. “Where are you going?”
“To eat.” Mu Yangling walked around him and said, “Don’t worry, I won’t leave with the child just like that. If I want to leave, I’ll inform you officially and leave openly.”
Qi Haoran was so anxious that his eyes turned red. “How can you do this? Am I so insignificant to you? You’re leaving me just because of one damned thought?!”
Mu Yangling walked around Qi Haoran and did not speak to him. Qi Haoran glared at her back with red eyes, then turned around and asked the soldiers to surround the courtyard. He called Fei Bai and Zhu Liang over and said with a pale face, “Guard the courtyard well. Don’t let the Princess Consort and Young Master go out. If they leave, I’ll take your lives!”
Fei Bai and Zhu Liang shivered and they gave each other a quick look. Knowing that the couple had quarreled, the two of them quickly agreed. After leaving, they discussed it and decided to respectively take the day and night shift.
The commotion outside did not escape Mu Yangling’s ears. She sneered and turned around to eat dinner. If she really wanted to leave, surely these people wouldn’t be able to keep her from doing so?
However, if she really wanted to leave, she wouldn’t leave secretly like this. She would do so openly.
But was she really going to leave?
Mu Yangling was confused.
In this world, the person who understood her the most and could tolerate her the most was Qi Haoran. If she were to leave Qi Haoran, she would never be able to find someone who could tolerate her so much.
Although Mu Yangling had never been in a relationship in her previous life, she knew from the way her heart fluttered when she was with Qi Haoran that she was in love with him.
Perhaps at first, it was not love, but just a mix of friendship and kinship. After so many years, they were already used to each other’s existence.
Mu Yangling couldn’t bear to part with Qi Haoran, but she couldn’t stand sharing a husband with someone. Without having to experience it, just the thought alone was intolerable.
Could it be that she had to endure that disgust and greet Qi Haoran with a smile?
Mu Yangling was never someone who could let herself suffer.
Qi Haoran woke up with a start and turned to look at his wife. Seeing that she had curled up into a ball and her shoulders were trembling, Qi Haoran’s heart felt like it was being stabbed by a knife. He slammed the bed hatefully and went forward to hug her shoulders. He complained, “Just bully me. I didn’t say that I wanted to take in a concubine or a handmaid. I didn’t even think about it. I was just worried that you would leave if I accidentally fell into someone’s trap.”
Mu Yangling’s tears moistened the pillow. Seeing how unreasonable Qi Haoran was, she turned around and kicked him. “Am I to blame for those filthy thoughts of yours?”
“That’s filthy?” Qi Haoran hugged Mu Yangling tightly and refused to let her move. He explained, “I-I’m just worried that if I get drunk or drugged and accidentally make a mistake, will you leave me too?”
At the end of the day, Qi Haoran’s focus had always been on whether Mu Yangling would leave him, not whether he wanted to make a mistake.
Qi Haoran admitted that he was lustful, but under the premise that Mu Yangling would leave him, he put away all his lustful thoughts. He had always been terrified and uneasy about Mu Yangling leaving him.
“As long as your will is firm and you don’t have a lustful heart, why should this be a problem?”
Qi Haoran hugged Mu Yangling and remained silent.
Mu Yangling’s tears fell onto the back of his hand and she cried softly, “I know. You’re just lustful.”
Qi Haoran tightened his grip on Mu Yangling, almost wanting to pull her into his arms. “I don’t care. In short, you’re not allowed to leave me.”
Mu Yangling lay in his arms with a dead heart and let him hug her. She asked, “If you insist on keeping me, you’ll only leave behind a shell. What’s the use?”
Qi Haoran buried his face in Mu Yangling’s neck and said in a muffled voice, “You’re not allowed to give up on me.”
Mu Yangling was silent for a long time. In the end, she asked, “If I drink and do something with another man, or if I see a handsome man and think about doing something with him, what will you do?”
Qi Haoran’s body stiffened. He flipped her over and pinned her down, then glared at her with reddened eyes. “Which man do you want to do something with?”
Mu Yangling smiled bitterly. “Look, I just casually said that and you couldn’t take it already. Meanwhile, you really thought about it. Qi Haoran, can you understand my heartache?”
Qi Haoran’s expression changed. Then, he looked at her with heartache and said timidly, “I—I’m a man…”
“Relationships don’t differentiate between men and women.” Mu Yangling said in an almost inaudible voice, “If you want to have multiple wives and concubines, you shouldn’t have made such a promise before marrying me. Perhaps I wouldn’t have married you, or perhaps I wouldn’t have given my heart to you when we married. I’d just be like other ordinary women and live a stable life.”
Qi Haoran’s heart felt like it was being pierced by a knife. He lay on Mu Yangling’s body and said repeatedly, “I won’t think about it anymore. Not ever again. Even if others force me with a knife, I won’t have any lustful thoughts. Ah Ling, don’t think about leaving me. Truly, it hurts here. It hurts very much!” Qi Haoran grabbed Mu Yangling’s hand and pressed it against his heart.
Source: NovelFull.com, updated on N𝘰vgo.co