'Will I ever get out?'
'Enigma is not a human…so, is she going to turn me into a lab rat?'
Bali's mind spun as his brain came up with horrifying possibilities one after another.
Truth be told, Bali wasn't afraid of death. In fact, he'd face it bravely and fight till his last breath.
But being locked up…it was the scariest thing he could imagine.
This fear traced its roots decades back when he was just 17.
It was the year 447. Just 17 years after the first human-abyss war ended. Coincidentally, he was born in the same year.
The war left humanity scrambling as they picked themselves up after utter ruin and near extinction.
People were terrified. They saw everyone they knew being killed in the most brutal manner possible.
So, that generation's orthodox view was very strength-centric. They wanted their kids to be strong. And not just any normal low or mid awakener, but a high awakener.
His level 7 parents saw both sides of the coin. They reached level 7 when the war was about to end and their lives took a drastic turn.
Having lived a very hard life until then as mid awakeners, they saw being a high awakener as the only guaranteed way to a safe life.
And 15 years later, they were distraught when their only son, Bali turned out to be a dual awakener.
So, they forced him to focus on one path and Bali promised them the same. He picked the fire path and neglected the space path.
But alas, it wasn't that easy. His space path kept coming back, it kept devouring the aura he poured into the fire path. It didn't allow him to keep widening the gap between his two paths.
Inevitably, Bali's progress in the fire path slowed and he was not able to reach the targets his parents set.
They let him go on for two more years, but then they decided it was enough. On his 17th birthday, he was locked up in his room.
"You'll be able to leave once you hit the targets. This is for your own good, concentrate." His father said before leaving.
A week passed and he tried his hardest. If he was only a single path awakener, he would have crossed his fire path target on the fifth day. But, there would always be some things you were born with, things you wouldn't be able to change.
For some, it was their height, for others, it was their family diseases, and for him, it was his space path.
So, he couldn't wish it away from his life. And its existence stopped him from reaching the target.
"Aww! You should give your all, honey. This is for your own good, we only want the best for you." His mom said with a disappointed face.
A month passed. Naturally, the target for the month was also raised. And Bali, despite pouring every fiber of his being, failed.
"Can't you just do what we say? We even provided you with the latest aura concentration formations! We are spending a lot of aura crystals on you! You are just…Son, don't you feel ashamed of your indolence? Your peers are doing so much better than you!
Do you know how I feel when their parents ask me about you? You are shaming us!"
Another month passed.
The 17-year-old Bali didn't know how many nights were spent crying nor could he count the number of times he cursed himself. It was all because of him. It was his mistake.
So, he cursed, prayed, and struggled.
Fate must be a bitch, for his efforts weren't rewarded.
"Heavens! It's for your own future! If you aren't a high awakener, you'll struggle like the rest!
Are you really our son? Can't you see how much we love you?" His father asked with a stern face as his mother watched with a deeply disappointed expression.
"B-But I am trying. I am practicing every secon—" Bali held in his tears and said tried to explain.
"Stop the lies. Kids your age are already level 2. How long are you going to be a level 1? If I were you, I'd put everything on the line. Anyway, Bali, you're getting out only after you hit the level." His mom chided him and slammed the door shut.
Bali stared blankly at the door and felt something inside break. Before he knew it, his cheeks were wet and his nails dug into his palms.
"I hate myself!"
"I wish I wasn't born like this!"
"I'm sorry for being born!"
"I'm sorry for disappointing you!"
He yelled each day, hoping that they were listening and forgave him for failure that wasn't his fault. And he practiced even more zealously, pushing his limits.
Six months passed since he was locked.
Each month, the target increased. So did the distance between him and the target.
His parents' disappointed voices and taunts whispered in his ear every waking second. Of course, every minute of his sleep was filled with nightmares. Ironically, even his nightmares only showed his current life. They too were at a loss at how this could get worse.
Before he knew it, something inside him broke.
…And he used a sword left for training and pierced himself. His powers acted instinctively and stopped his death.
Shortly after, he was taken to the emergency unit.
"Y-You! How can you do this, Bali?" His mother muttered in the ward, without any tears.
"Yes! You should be a man and face adversities. Being a coward and choosing suicide? Tch. Is he really my son?" His father clenched his fists and commented.
"What do you mean? You think I cheated on you?" His mother glared at his father, forgetting that there was a boy who need more attention than anyone else.
"I was about to get promoted…but because of him, all my hard work went down the drain." His father waved his hand and looked down into Bali's eyes with a gaze that was felt totally alien.
"If you don't want to work hard and stay lazy, then don't work. It's my fault for keeping expectations on you anyway. Some people…are just not destined for great things." Shaking his head, he left.
His mother forced a smile. "We can provide for you, no problem. We won't force you anymore. We really love and we did it for you."
And she left, leaving him to the med bots.
That night, Bali escaped the hospital and ran into the streets.
He was on the verge of advancing to level 2. So, he decided to return once he broke through.
Not because he liked how they treated him, but because a small part of him still believed that they loved him.
Whatever they did, was to make his life better, even though it ended up making him miserable.
Those few days turned into weeks and he struggled to survive.
Back then, Mercury was still in post-war recovery and there were plenty of illegal activities. He did whatever he could to stay afloat.
Days turned into weeks and finally, months passed. No one came looking for him.
Bali was faced with a harsh truth.
He was abandoned.
If they really wanted to, level 7s could have easily tracked him down.
But they didn't. He initially thought they had an accident, but no. He saw them in the news, giving interviews and his mother announced that she was pregnant.
When asked whether they had other children, she replied. "No."
*** *** ***
"Haa~ Haa~ Haa~" Bali breathed out heavily as he faced the walls with the same fear he once had.
Even his strongest attacks couldn't put a dent on the walls.
Materials that weren't affected by a peak level 9's attacks were just too rare and too little. It was completely shocking.
But more than shock, it reminded him of his fears. Bali thought that he grew out of his fears. That he wasn't that weak boy who cried every day in that lone room.
But only now did he realize that the fear still lived within him. His strength just prevented it from surfacing.
And when it finally did, Bali was once again faced with the bitter truth.
As he closed his eyes, resigning to fate, the door slowly creaked open.
"Em, there was an emergency. I hope you didn't mind." A familiar voice said in an apologetic tone.
Bali teleported out immediately and yelled.
"Fuck you! I totally mind!"