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Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

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Chapter 189: A good job that makes people swear

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Chapter 189: A good job that makes people swear

Chapter 189 A good job that makes people swear After a long time of trouble, it was finally time to carry out the mission. Qi Long's script was designed for the two of them to rush in and start fighting. Dongqiang said that this was a very cool story and asked him to change the script. The agent had to sneak in without being noticed by anyone, so he had to use a grappling hook to grab the roof, then climb up and enter through the window. "I understand!" Qi Long nodded: "Change it!" Dongqiang put on sunglasses and got into character: "Assistant, bring me my hook!" This is a crosstalk design by two people. When putting on sunglasses, he becomes the character in the play, and when taking off the sunglasses, he jumps out of the character. This simple little design allows the audience to easily distinguish whether they are in the play or outside the play, so they don't get confused about when they are in the play and when they are outside the play. Qi Long squatted down, and like moving a table, he used all his strength to lift up the large object and handed it to him. Amid the laughter of the audience, Dongqiang took off his sunglasses and complained: "Is the hook so big?" He put on sunglasses and started again. This time, Qi Long handed over a toothpick.

This is standard leg work, where the funny man always uses the wrong method to create laughter. The third time, everything was back to normal. Dongqiang took the hook and began to spin like a man lassoing a horse. He turned around and put his sunglasses on his forehead and said, "Do some voice acting for me. This performance is too awkward!" "Oh" Dongqiang nodded, the sunglasses moved back in front of his eyes, and he began to rotate the hook again. Qi Long took a deep breath: [You are a mighty and majestic man who leashes horses. I wish to melt in your broad chest! ] The audience burst into laughter. Dong Qiang took off his sunglasses and pushed him away: "What the hell is this? I'm lassoing a horse. I'm grappling with it. It makes that sound of breaking through the air when it's spinning!" "I thought I was adding background music for you. Let's do it again!" This time, Qi Long started to "whoosh, whoosh, whoosh", and this "whoosh" did not stop, making Dongqiang continue to spin. He spun for more than ten seconds, and the audience laughed. "My helicopter? Keep spinning!" Qi Long turned the tables and said, "You are the one who lost it!" "If you don't lose the dubbing, how can I lose it?" "If you don't lose it, how can I lose it?" “I’m going to find another screenwriter!” "No, no, no, I apologize. It's your fault, okay?" "Ok?" After some pulling and starting over, he threw it out this time. But after throwing it out, Qi Long did a "twist~boom", just like lighting a rocket. Dong Qiang blamed him, and he took back the foreshadowing, saying that you fulfilled your dream in the movie, and I will also fulfill my dream of being a rocket. "It wasn't you I lost, it was the hook!" This part is the funny part of dubbing and ventriloquism. For a while, the dubbing of the flying time of the hook was too long, which made Dongqiang complain that the Black Skull Castle was Mount Everest? After a while, the dubbing time was too short, causing Dongqiang to complain that the Black Skull lived in a bungalow?

After the dubbing was finally successful, the two of them went up smoothly, and Dongqiang asked him: "We are going to see the black skull next, right?" "Sir Agent, according to our intelligence, the Black Skull is on the first floor. We will go down from the 20th floor of the castle, through the laser array on the 19th floor, the alloy door on the 18th floor, the beast array on the 17th floor, and the Bagua array on the 16th floor." Just like reciting a line of words, Qi Long recited a bunch of formation names. After he finally finished, Dong Qiang asked a soul-searching question: "Then why did we come up here?" "Didn't the script you changed say that we should come up? We were going to fight as soon as the door opened!" Qi Long took off his sunglasses and replied. "Then follow yours!" Qi Long complained to the audience speechlessly, "Look, this is the evil Party A. He asked you to revise it for a long time, but in the end you still have to use the first draft!" The two men broke into the room, and Dong Qiang shouted, "Hey, Black Skull, I won't let you go today. You've done so many evil things, and I won't let you go today!" "Yes!" Qi Long shouted from behind. Then the two of them were awkwardly on the stage. After a while, Dongqiang turned around and asked, "Where's the Black Skull?" "Your master is not here today!" "That won't work. Why don't you just make a cameo appearance and play the role of Black Skull for a while!" "Ah? I, I'll act, but what about Qingdie?" "He's not important!" Qi Long was sent to play the villain. Dong Qiang repeated his lines. Qi Long said: "And then? You dared to break into my castle, not only by yourself, but also brought your Qingdie with you. I see that you, Qingdie, are very handsome, and look as handsome as Pan An, and better than Xu Gong in the north of the city!" "What a mess. I, I am the protagonist. Why are you praising yourself? Change the script. Qingdie died as soon as she entered the door. You talk to me!" Yes, we have to listen to the investors, Qi Long said again. "And then what? You actually dared to break into my castle. See? Your assistant, who was so handsome and even more talented than Mr. Xu in the north of the city, will end up like you!" "Can we not mention him?" After the third time, Qi Long finally calmed down: "Then what? With your strength, it's not certain who will kill whom?" "Then let me show you my gun!" Dong Qiang pulled out his gun. Qi Long suddenly shrank his neck: "Congratulations, Agent Zheshisha, you passed the black skull test we designed for you. Come on, let's prepare to eat Kung Pao Chicken. Ouch, these peanuts are crunchy when you bite them." "Principal?" Dong Qiang asked in disbelief. "That's right, I'm the principal!" "What about the Black Skull? Is the Black Skull fake?" Qi Long put his hands behind his back: "Haha, Agent Ochre, you are so easily fooled. I am the Black Skull who has become your principal. Now you can die! Biu!" "Can my protagonist die?" Dong Qiang took off his sunglasses and questioned. Qi Long thought about it and said, "Oh, that's right. Then you bet that there are no bullets in my gun." The two of them started acting out the same plot again. They bet that the Black Skull's gun had no bullets. Dong Qiang wanted to counterattack. Qi Long gave him a wink and turned into his wife again: "Oh, I just wanted to tell you how scary the Black Skull is. Look, if you hadn't changed the script, you would have died. What should we do, mother and daughter? Sob." "Hey, don't." Dong Qiang took off his sunglasses: "I have to imagine that it is Zhang Ruonan crying with tears in her eyes!" Wearing sunglasses: "Can't I go home with you? I don't want to be an agent anymore!"

Qi Long instantly turned into a black skeleton again: "Haha, Agent Ochre Evil, you are so easily fooled." "Black Skull!" Dong Qiang drew his gun. Qi Long shrank his neck: "Oh, your test is too bad, you can't eat Kung Pao Chicken anymore, these peanuts are crunchy" This long paragraph is constantly recycling foreshadowing. The Black Skull directly turns into the Thousand-Faced Witch. Sometimes she is the principal, sometimes she is his wife, and sometimes she turns back into the Black Skull. Dongqiang was annoyed and threw down his sunglasses: "I don't want to act with you anymore, what a messed up script, I'm going home!" Qi Long also took off his sunglasses: "Are you going home?" "Yes, go home. I won't act with you anymore. I'll find another screenwriter!" Qi Long interrupted the delivery boy's Henan accent: "Brother, I need to go home, please pick up the package!" "How can this be possible?" Dong Qiang faced the audience and pointed at Qi Long in astonishment. The two brothers took a step back and bowed to express their gratitude, and the crosstalk ended. "Good!" There was thunderous applause from the audience. It was a complete job for the new performer, and it told a complete story with so many jokes in the middle. In the end, what was thought to be just a prelude to the jokes were all turned over and thrown out. The audience was very satisfied watching it. At this time, they applauded and cheered hard to support Qi Long and Dong Qiang’s innovative new crosstalk! After the two of them went down from the side stage, there was a group of crosstalk performers on the side stage, all listening to their new crosstalk. Sometimes, it is more valuable to amuse experts than to amuse laymen. Everyone is so happy that they even say thank you for your hard work! "Great, Qilong, damn great!" Mr. Shi Fukuan, who came to perform group work with his apprentice Guo Qilin and apprentice Yu Qian who had just finished filming, also gave a thumbs up and praised. It was so good that I burst into swear words. This job involves a wide range of things, including magic tricks, playing characters, dialects, ventriloquism, speaking in lines, and even body movements and somersaults. Those are all real skills. Looking backstage, there are not many people who can do it. Even if they can, they can't do it as well as Qi Long! Gao Dongqiang looked at his master and asked, "Master, what about me?" "You're good too!" Dongqiang immediately smiled happily. Not to mention him, even Yu Qian, who was as old as him, would smile like a child when he heard his master praising him. Just this one compliment of "not bad" can put him in a good mood for several days. Because in the crosstalk industry, most masters are strict and rarely praise their apprentices, which makes praise precious. Every time at this time, Qi Long would always envy Dong Qiang. Ever since his master left, not many people said that his crosstalk was not good enough. They were all praising him, which made him have no idea what his level was. He could only be more strict with himself, work hard to do better and not embarrass his master! (End of this chapter)

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