Growl~
I heard the loud and fearsome growl of the monster in the distance and hurriedly looked at the two books in front of me.
‘Just what is he trying to do?’
….I still couldn’t understand what the old man was trying to do. Was he trying to teach us or did he have another agenda?
“He did say this will help us, but…”
Looking towards the distance, I felt a little skeptical.
How was defeating a monster going to help me?
“It looks like I don’t really have a choice, do I?”
I saw no way out of this place unless I defeated the monster. This was some sort of weird space that the old man had created. There was no way I could break it unless I followed his instructions.
“Which book should I use?”
I alternated my gaze between the two books.
‘Fast to learn, but brings a lot of pain, or slow to learn, but no pain.’
The answer felt almost automatic to me. I didn’t think once before choosing the red book; Fasts to learn, but brings a lot of pain.
“…I can handle pain.”
Of this much, I was certain of.
“Ukh!”
As the first page turned, a sudden and intense wave of pain washed over me, nearly overwhelming my senses. It was so painful that I almost felt my entire body freeze from the pain.
‘How could…!’
I bit my lower lip hard, the metallic taste of iron filling my mouth.
“This is ridiculous—”
Cra Crack!
My bones cracked, and I felt my body shifting. An intense surge of mana erupted from deep within me, flooding through every fiber of my being.
I could hardly breathe, let alone think.
All I knew was the pain.
The pain consumed every corner of my mind, shifting from the searing agony of burning alive to the sharp, concentrated pain akin to a knife’s stab. I endured every imaginable pain I could think of as power surged through my body.
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I endured.
Endured, and endured.
At the same time, I flipped the pages. With each page I flipped, the more painful the experience became.
My hands moved faster.
“Kh—!”
And yet…
‘When does this stop?’
The agony seemed endless. No matter how much I endured, the pain only intensified, growing stronger with each passing second.
“Akh—”
Despite my high mental fortitude, I found myself screaming.
I found this baffling, yet it was beyond my control. My body simply reacted on its own.
‘No, no… This is too much!’
“S-stop.”
I tried to stop it, but it wouldn’t stop.
I screamed again, but no words came out.
I had lost my voice.
The pain had completely taken over.
‘Ah, this…’
I was suddenly overcome with despair. This pain… I had to make it stop.
Growl~
And then I heard it. The monster in the distance.
‘Right, so long as I defeat it…’
Looking down, I saw that I had only managed to turn ten pages but I thought this was enough.
“Uwaa!”
Without a moment’s hesitation, I sprinted towards the distant monster. As I drew closer, I caught a glimpse of the creature hiding in the darkness—a grotesque monster with two large goat horns, massive arms, and an enormous, dark body. Its head resembled that of a goat but its body was more like that of a gorilla.
It was a weird creature, but I couldn’t care less about it.
Swoosh—
I charged directly at the creature, channeling all the power I had accumulated from reading the red book.
Cra Crack!
My body crackled and howled, as threads erupted from all directions, each glinting with a faint purple light.
A black film expanded from beneath me at the same time, consuming the surroundings as my domain expanded.
I became even stronger.
“Ahhh—!”
I attacked the monster with all I had.
But…
Pa!
As my fist landed on its body, the expected reaction didn’t occur.
Looking up and staring at the monster’s body which was unharmed, I felt a lump form in my throat.
The monster raised its large arm.
“Oh, shi—”
My world turned black.
“—it!”
“Hua!”
At least, until I woke up again.
“Haa… Haa…”
Holding onto my chest, I hastily looked around. I was back in the cave and my body was fine.
“What just—”
“You died.”
The old man looked at me, his expression filled with disappointment.
“You hardly even lasted a few seconds against it. I thought you were talented but you don’t really seem to amounting to much.”
He sighed.
“And here I thought I’d get to have a few people to talk to.”
He waved his hand.
“Whatever, I’ll just resign myself to the fact that there’s no hope for me. I’ll turn into a puppet knowing that three other idiots will soon join me.”
Hearing his words, I stopped.
This…
I was feeling quite annoyed.
“This is just my first try. I didn’t think the pain would be this much. Just give me time to get used to it. I’ll get used to it.”
“Tsk.”
The old man clicked his tongue and shook his head, mumbling to himself, ‘Disappointing. How disappointing.’
Fueled by my growing anger, I immediately moved towards the books and grabbed the red one.
‘You think I can’t do it?’
One thing I took immense pride in was my ability to endure pain. Failure on the first attempt didn’t matter; it likely happened because I approached the monster too hastily. I needed to gather more power.
I needed to suffer more.
‘…Yes, I need to suffer more.’
I opened the book and clenched my teeth.
“M-more.”
***
“I’m hungry.”
“….Please give me some food.”
“My brother is… dying.”
“H-help.”
“Wait a second, make a line. I have plenty of food.”
All Kaelion could see were hands. They reached out to him in all directions. Begging, pleading, and imploring him for food.
The hands…
They were all young children, their clothes tattered and their cheeks hollow. Their lifeless eyes mirrored the hardships of their lives, evoking memories Kaelion had desperately tried to bury.
‘Help, them. I have to help them….’
Kaelion took out whatever food he had.
“Make a line. I’ve got plenty of food.”
but even though he had food, it wasn’t enough.
There were too many children.
How could he feed so many of them…?
‘No, this can’t go on.’
In the end, Kaelion sold all his most prized possessions to buy more food. He used it to feed the poor children, seeing in them a reflection of his own past.
For how long had they starved?
He had once endured nearly twenty days without food. The memory of that agony was still vivid in his mind—the gnawing emptiness in his stomach, the lack of energy, and the haze that blurred his perception of the world.
The world felt gray, and time seemed endless.
The children in front of him were the representation of his past.
Of his suffering.
His hands started to move faster.
“Eat well, there’s plenty of food for everyone.”
Kaelion continued to feed the children. It was an endless cycle that only came to a stop when he no longer had anything to sell besides his clothes.
He… had already sold everything he owned.
And yet, the children remained.
“Is there no more food?”
“Ah… I guess I was too late.”
“My family…”
“I’m hungry.”
Kaelion covered his mouth.
“No, I…”
He wanted to say he had more food, but he didn’t.
He had nothing.
He was poor.
…And he was also hungry.
But still, he couldn’t care less about himself. He had to find a way to feed the children.
And so, after a little bit of thought, Kaelion made a decision.
He was going to start robbing the rich.
‘They’re rich anyways. What does it matter if they have a little bit less gold? They’re the reason why the children are poor, to begin with. It’s time for them to give back to the community.’
Thus, Kaelion’s life as a thief began.
He robbed from the rich and used the wealth to feed the poor.
“Here, there’s plenty of food for everyone to eat. Come, everyone. Eat at your heart’s content!”
There was nothing more fulfilling for Kaelion than seeing the children eating happily. It was enough to make his cold heart smile.
But…
Actions had consequences, and Kaelion learned this the hard way.
“A-ah, this…”
Coming back one day to feed the children again, he was met with a sea of blood. Limbs scattered across the ground as faces Kaelion had grown familiar with appeared lifeless on the ground. Seeing the carpet of red that formed on the ground and the corpses of the children on the ground, Kaelion lost it.
Thump!
Falling to his knees, his eyes lost focus.
He recalled the memories of the children and their smiles as he handed them food. For once, he had given them hope.
But now, it also became clear to him.
“How could…?”
Rather than giving them hope, he had taken their life away.
***
Drip, drip—
Rain drizzled from above as two figures stood in the downpour. The soft patter of raindrops mingled with the silence between them, the taller man looking down at the younger one. The world around them blurred into a gray haze as Caius kept his head lowered.
“Repeat after me, I’m a talentless shit with no emotions. I got rid of my emotions because I am afraid of pain.”
“…..”
“Say it—”
“I’m a talentless shit with no emotions. I got rid of my emotions because I am afraid of pain.”
The words flowed smoothly out of Caius’s mouth.
He was accustomed to saying those words. It was only natural for them to flow from his mouth without much thought.
That, and…
Slap—
The slaps that came along with them.
“…I’m a talentless shit with no emotions. I got rid of my emotions because I am afraid of pain.”
“Good, now say it again. On repeat. Over and over again.”
“I’m a talentless shit with no emotions. I got rid of my emotions because I am afraid of pain.”
“Again.”
“I’m a talentless shit with no emotions. I got rid of my emotions because I am afraid of pain.”
“Again.”
“I’m a talentless shit with no emotions. I got rid of my emotions because I am afraid of pain.”
“Again.”
As Caius repeated each phrase over and over again, he found himself realizing something. ‘I am indeed a talentless shit with no emotions.’ The more he said the words the more he realized the truth in them.
He indeed had no emotions.
He had lost them the moment he lost to Julien.
All to run away from the pain.
In that regard, his words held some merits to them.
He…
“I’m a talentless shit with no emotions. I got rid of my emotions because I am afraid of pain.”
…Was indeed a talentless trash with no emotions.
He was…
A failure.
***
Standing within the white void, three projections appeared before the old man. He shook his head upon seeing Julien, a look of deep disappointment crossing his features.
“His mental fortitude is quite strong, but his obsession is greater.”
The old man shook his head once again.
“…How saddening.”
At the rate he was going, he wasn’t going to last very long.
But it wasn’t just him.
Staring at the two other projections, the old man shook his head again.
“Idiots. They’re three idiots.”
The biggest idiots he had ever seen.
“Argh—! I can’t watch this farce any longer.”
With a wave of his hand, everything shattered, and with soft ‘thuds,’ Kaelion, Caius, and Julien collapsed to the ground, finding themselves back in the old man’s room.
Staring at them, the old man clicked his tongue.
“I’ve wasted enough energy on you three today.”
He checked the time.
“Reset will happen soon. Get some sleep and recover yourselves for now. We’ll continue this next time.”
Without giving them a chance to speak, the old man walked over to his bed and pulled a blanket over himself.
Within seconds of closing his eyes, he…
“Uarrrkh—!”
…began snoring.
His snores were so loud that the entire room shook.
That night, neither three of them managed to sleep more than a few minutes.
Simply put, his snores were way too loud.
“Ueeekrh!”