181: Novia and Sigma during the Magic Mercenary Period (5k5) "Now, what should I do?" A room in a swamp mansion was filled with drowsy warmth from the setting sun. Despite the day's accumulated fatigue, Sigma's mind, which should have become scattered, was as active as in the morning. He vaguely remembered that before the hypocritical Holy Grail War began, Francesca, who had hired him, said this to him: "After summoning the hero, the rest is up to you!" He closed his eyes gently and recalled the past. He was an orphan since childhood. After being picked up by the government, it was determined that he was good at commanding familiars. He was thoroughly indoctrinated with magic training and the use of weapons in this area, and thus became a magician acting as a mercenary. Later, due to human experiments conducted by the government, he lost his emotions, and day and night, year after year, he just spent his days like this. After the government they had previously served was destroyed, they were hired by the people who destroyed that government. This is the only kind of relationship they had. The previous government also brainwashed Sigma about how powerful and absolute the government is.
But from the moment the government changed so easily, he understood that it was all a lie and that nothing could actually be trusted. The reason why the emotionally indifferent young man continued to complete his work in a dull manner was just to get a good night's sleep and daily meals. After all, these things were the most precious to the environment in which he was born and raised. To survive, just to survive, nothing else, everything on that earth - In the past, in the desert under the scorching sun, two camels were carrying people and moving slowly forward. Although they looked like a pair, the two rode their camels at a rapid pace without speaking to each other. ".....Sigma." "What's wrong, Novia?" The sound of talking merged with the sound of the desert wind, and it seemed to have changed from a slightly noisy noise to a background sound like a BGM effect. "After thinking about it, even though we're just partners, I still think it's better to give you something. Do you want to eat?" Hearing this, Sigma looked at the plastic bag hanging in Novia's hand. The bag was filled with snacks such as potato chips and soft candies that could be bought in ordinary stores, most of which had been opened. But Novia seemed to be just saying it casually, and it didn't look like he had any intention of giving it to Sigma, but Sigma wouldn't accept it either. After all, Sigma is an extremely cautious mercenary, so how could he easily eat the food of someone he just met? Not long after Sigma began to work as a mercenary using magic, he was betrayed by a fellow mercenary. When they were working together to suppress a criminal organization composed of people who used magic, he lured Sigma into an enemy ambush, and Sigma was hit from behind and cursed. Moreover, the other party was a fellow countryman who grew up in the same facility as him since childhood - in terms of the results, the one who survived was Sigma. "I still have... I still have reasons to live! I have people I must protect to the end! I also want a lot of things! Our hometown is the same. After the destruction of that 'facility', nothing has changed! So I have to change it myself! In order to prevent people like us from being born again in this world! For this goal, I can't let that organization be destroyed now... So I dedicated everything! I gave my time, my life, and you who grew up with me in the same facility! For important things, I am willing to even sacrifice you, my best friend! Why did it become like this? Answer me, Sigma! There is no grand goal in mind, no will, 'you who don't even intend to own', why do you want to kill me! Why... why do you surpass me? What belief brings out your strength!
What are you living for! You are not afraid to kill me! What are you living for...?" "I just don't like pain, and I don't really want to die. Why do I resort to violence? It's because humans have always been dominated by the body, the container. No matter how noble a person is, when being beaten, his entire brain will only be controlled by the "sense of pain"...Also, what you said is really a joke that is hard to laugh at." Although that person considered himself a close friend before his death, unfortunately Sigma had no such idea at all. After Sigma finished everything and received the payment from his employer, he kept on replaying the borrowed comedy show DVD over and over again. Although from the perspective of others, it may not be apparent that he is enjoying it. However, his expression showed a very mild reaction and he indeed enjoyed watching those programs. But, there is only one thing, a mixed thought in my mind. If I could at least tell him a joke at the end that would put him in a better mood, it would make his departure a little easier. At least that's what young Sigma thought. Sigma didn't know much about Novia in front of him. He just knew that he came from somewhere else, but he didn't care too much. After all, they became partners by coincidence. As long as it didn't affect his survival, it was enough. "By the way, what do you do in a day, Sigma?" "Same as everyone else." "Does that mean you've been studying in school since this morning?" "No, I have no schooling and no parents." "You look so serious, if it were someone else, they might feel guilty... After all, I'm just like you." "Having said that, you're living a pretty leisurely life, Novia." "It's to absorb glucose, so that the brain can function and improve efficiency. Of course, I also want to eat it. After all, I eat steamed buns all day long, so I need to change the taste occasionally." Looking at the silver-haired boy's reminiscing expression, Sigma realized that the other person was from a completely different world from himself. Because whenever Sigma wanted to recall the past, the words of his 'adoptive parents' would come to his mind. "You, you, listen carefully, my fellow man, those you should destroy are those who intend to take something away from us." Even though he now knew that those words were meaningless and were only used for brainwashing, Sigma still couldn't forget them. Sigma didn't hate those words, nor did he feel sad, but the fact that he had been repeatedly told these words still remained in his memory. However, when he thought of that as his oldest memory, Sigma always had an idea - Do those words still affect the way you live? Whenever he thought of this, Sigma would think about it. Apart from my life, is there anything else that can be taken away from me now? "Oh, by the way, Sigma, have you read the book I recommended to you?" "No."
"I'm really looking forward to it. When you have time to finish watching it, please tell me your thoughts." Suddenly, Sigma was somewhat concerned about what the silver-haired boy said. Is that book called "Les Miserables" really that good? But it was just a brief episode and he quickly put it out of his mind. Later, Sigma, who took on several missions together, felt that this guy named Novia really didn't care about life. On a civil war battlefield that is totally unnecessary, energy is wasted on rescuing journalists and children trapped on the battlefield, money is spent on settling those unnecessary people and then donated... the only advantage is probably that as long as there is something to eat, you can survive. After thinking about Novia's behavior for a while, Sigma came to the vague conclusion that "it feels like there is not much difference for a mother who left on her own will." But he actually understood that there was a difference, because magicians were people who had almost nothing to do with things like human emotions. However, when Sigma saw the children in front of Novia praising Novia, he thought that it might be because Novia was now a magic mercenary, so he could not make these experiences public, but the desire to announce his abilities to the world had accumulated a lot. After all, humans are social animals who yearn for a sanctuary that can protect them from harm. Although in the general value system, people admire lone heroes more than millions of heroes, the heroes that humans yearn for are absolute loners. After a while, was it a few months or a year or two? Sigma couldn't remember much. After all, for him, survival was enough and the concept of time was completely meaningless. The boy remembered that day, a generous employer hired 300 mercenaries and hundreds of magicians specifically to kill a mysterious magician who had been destroying his business for years. Although from the perspective of ordinary people, human traffickers who help children to be trafficked are indeed "evil", it doesn't matter to magicians at all. No matter where they are, the logic of magicians has not changed, or it can be said to be order. Even if it does not coincide with modern morality, this is how the magician society is. Sigma, who was hired, naturally felt the same way about this, but thinking that Enova's character would not accept such a thing, he did not inform him. However, when Sigma, who arrived at the scene as a mercenary, saw an unknown magician facing the magic group alone. On the way here, he heard that in the past year or two, this magician had always been obstructing his employer's business. However, in his opinion, he was simply hired by the other party, which was a case of black robbing black. "... unexpectedly, it came so quickly?" Although his face was covered by magic, Sigma, who was familiar with Novia, would definitely know it was him. However, he did not feel like sighing. He thought, let him die, he didn't care about his life anyway. "Ahahahaha, you stinky magician, you've caused me so much trouble in the past few years. You've taken away so many little kids with magical skills. The big shots up there are already hoping that you'll die soon!" Whoosh! As the employer's voice fell, a bullet shot out from the back of Novia. It was one of the children taken away from Novia. Although he managed to escape, Novia now understood why. But it doesn't matter anymore, because these children have nowhere to go. They were all sold by their parents. Although I can't send them to the ship myself this time, as long as I delay the arrival time, it will be enough. "Tear this fellow's flesh apart, crush his bones; burn it with light, pierce it with fire, freeze it, electrocute it, corrode it, collapse it... Yes, everyone, it doesn't matter whether these little ghosts scream or not. However, it would be a headache if I lost the ability to leave offspring for the future. After all, magicians with such high quality are rare, so I have to pay close attention to the functioning of my heart and nerves. Even if it is the worst case, such as losing my head, it doesn't matter. It is enough to just retain the reproductive function."
Compared to Novia, the employer's tone at this time is more like a magician. He is not deliberately pretending to be a bad guy or sarcastic. His speech should just be a calm statement of facts. After listening to his speech, Sigma didn't feel any particular emotion. Because he was originally a magician born under the government's experiments, he had been subjected to many experiments in which his life was despised since he was young. By the time he knew concepts such as human rights, the country had already been destroyed. Therefore, even when Sigma heard that these children were about to suffer such a fate, he felt neither sympathy nor anger. However, although no emotion emerged in his heart, he still thought about it and said directly in front of everyone: "You're going to die." "I know, but it's not good or evil, it's not right or wrong, I just can't keep silent. Ignorance is not a sin, knowing but doing nothing is not a sin either, but being powerful and knowing but doing nothing is an undeniable sin. In this world, the future is ahead, the memories are behind, and a corner is a story. This moment today is just the tip of the iceberg of those stories—" The silver-haired boy canceled the magic that he used to conceal his face, and planned to put more energy into delaying time. "So maybe, in the story, today is a good day to die." Then, Sigma realized that it was not a deliberate attempt to be nice or speak lofty words, but rather Novia's statement should be just a calm statement of facts. Some things are faster than words. Some things are more accurate than words. Because the real answer exists before the facts. Therefore, he felt a strange feeling, not from the outside, but from within his own body, an emotion that emerged. "You, you, listen carefully, son of the same nation." A voice echoed in Sigma's mind, a nostalgic voice, words that were clearly meaningless. "You should destroy people who intend to take something from us." A nostalgic voice, words that no longer have any meaning. However, that voice shook Sigma's heart at this moment. I understand, so that's how it is. I... have always thought that everyone lives in a different world from me, because no matter if they are magicians or ordinary people, they all have parents and relatives who are connected by blood. It turns out that it has nothing to do with whether a person can survive. It's like an extremely heavy object that one person cannot lift. However, when everyone works together, they can lift it with incredible ease. There must be a clear distinction between being too heavy to lift and being able to lift it easily. I was watching from the sidelines, thinking that I couldn't lift it anyway, and was unwilling to lend a hand. Since this was a game that could not be won, I had no intention of participating and was unwilling to risk my own chips... Yes, this is wrong. Maybe if I go to help, that extremely heavy object can be lifted up easily. I have been playing the role of a bystander for a long time. No matter whether what is happening in front of me is a success or a failure, or whether it is worth gambling, I am just a bystander. I have always mistakenly believed this. No.....I am not a bystander, nor should I be a bystander, I should also participate... At first glance, the battle before us seems to be an unwinnable duel, at first glance, it seems not worth the gamble, and at first glance, there is no reason to help. However, going to gamble, going to participate, and going to believe may change the outcome of winning or losing... The only thing you place your bet on is what you trust.
Trust or something else means being connected to something, and being connected to something means existence. So it is at this moment that Sigma's feelings that were lost in the experiment finally "exist". Confused, contented, and full of joy.
