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The Eight-Hour Work System Of The Imperial Court Lackeys

The Eight-Hour Work System Of The Imperial Court Lackeys

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Chapter 4: joke

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Chapter 4: joke

"So, I, the Jinyiwei Commander in charge of money, am here to discuss a business deal with you."

The Jinyiwei (Imperial Guards) had ten Chiliarchies, corresponding to ten Jinyiwei Commanders. A Jinyiwei Commander, unlike a regular soldier's chiliarch, held an official rank of fifth grade. Logically, a Jinyiwei of Li Miao's level should appear in cases of confiscation and extermination of high-ranking court officials or powerful local factions.

For someone like Yan Xiaosheng, who, to put it nicely, was the underworld boss of the capital, or to put it bluntly, a mere white glove, having a Commander personally handle him was giving him too much credit.

So, when Yan Xiaosheng heard Li Miao say he wanted to discuss business, his eyes lit up.

If the Jinyiwei (Imperial Guards) were coming for him personally, he would surely die. But if they were still wary of the people behind him and wanted to negotiate, he might be able to save his life.

Of course, he didn't want to die. If he could negotiate, he could bargain, and perhaps even his life could be part of the deal.

But Li Miao waved his hand, directly dispelling Yan Xiaosheng's calculations: "Don't overthink it, your death is certain."

Yan Xiaosheng's eyes dimmed. After a long pause, he finally spoke, "Since I'm going to die anyway, what's the point of talking?"

At this point, he had given up all illusions, and his words were no longer respectful.

He was just waiting for Li Miao to show a flaw, then he would act to subdue this tired-looking Commander.

Anyone whose internal cultivation reached a certain level would naturally be full of vigor and energy, with strength flowing endlessly before their life force ran out, rarely showing fatigue. Seeing Li Miao's weary face, it was either his cultivation was insufficient, or his condition was off.

His martial arts were considered top-tier in the martial world. Perhaps he could truly take Li Miao hostage and escape the capital.

As long as he escaped the capital, the world was vast. He could find a place to hide, and after ten or so years, change his name and identity. With his martial arts, he would still live a comfortable life.

"Listen to me first." Li Miao lowered his head and took a sip of wine, not even looking at Yan Xiaosheng. He seemed completely unaware that Yan Xiaosheng's muscles were tensed, and his internal energy was circulating, already preparing for a desperate fight.

"We have important business coming up, and we're short on manpower. All of us who usually stay in the capital need to go out for a while."

"Before we leave, the Commander's intention is to first eliminate those who are causing trouble in the capital, lest everyone leaves and you stir up more problems."

"Leader Yan, you're the most conspicuous one. But when we investigated, we found that you serve quite a few people. If we raid your home and uncover some big figures, it wouldn't look good."

"I just mentioned it, saying this matter still needs to fall on you, and then I was forced into it, told to come and talk to you."

At this point, Li Miao frowned, seemingly very displeased about being assigned this task. The Jinyiwei (Imperial Guards) guarding behind him exchanged glances and secretly chuckled.

Their Jinyiwei Commander was good at everything: strong in ability, high in martial arts, capable in both literary and martial arts.

It was just that he only had four hours of energy a day. After that time, he would immediately look like he hadn't slept for three days and wouldn't do any work. If the Commander hadn't personally spoken up and smashed a teacup this time, even the Lord Commissioner probably couldn't have ordered him around.

If he didn't have this laziness, he would probably have become a Lord Commissioner or even a Tongzhi long ago.

"Here's the thing, I can let you live for three more days." Li Miao said casually to Yan Xiaosheng, "During these three days, you go and settle accounts with your masters, give them the money they're owed. As for the rest, find someone to pack it up and send it to us."

"This way, we don't have to bargain with your masters, and your masters don't have to fear us uncovering anything. Isn't this a win-win situation?"

"And then?" Yan Xiaosheng asked through gritted teeth.

"And then?" Li Miao glanced at him: "Then you die."

"You'll die suddenly at home. Remember to die a miserable death to scare off those who haven't shown themselves yet, and to save me some trouble."

"Damn it!" Yan Xiaosheng was almost laughing with anger at this point: "You Jinyi (Embroidered Clothing) indeed don't speak human language. You get all the advantages, I have to obediently commit suicide, and I have to die a miserable death! What the hell am I getting out of this?!"

"You can leave five taels of silver for your unborn child, that's it." Li Miao spread his hands at him.

With just that sentence, Yan Xiaosheng's expression instantly froze, but the next moment he looked at Li Miao strangely, as if nothing had happened.

"I've never been married, nor have I ever had any children."

"Didn't you buy a geisha last month? She's pregnant. Our people had a doctor confirm it, it's certain."

"When you die, once we receive the money, we'll give her five taels of silver and let her go." Li Miao said seriously.

Yan Xiaosheng was silent.

His expression changed repeatedly, at times hesitant, at times frantic, but in the end, a fierce look dominated his face.

"Go to hell!"

He roared, his palms under the table directly shattering the tabletop and fiercely striking towards Li Miao's chest!

What geisha, what child? As long as he could live, what children couldn't he have in the future?!

Now he would rely on his thirty years of hard-trained martial arts to fight for his life! One should know that his title of "Iron Palm Maitreya" was also built on human lives!

At this moment, his peripheral vision swept over the Jinyiwei (Imperial Guards) standing around, guarding against them attacking together to save Li Miao. But those people kept their eyes down, not even moving, watching his palms approach Li Miao's chest.

Bang!

A dull thud, and his palms landed on Li Miao's chest.

Thud, thud, thud, thud!

It was Yan Xiaosheng who suddenly flew backward, his feet constantly dissipating force, each step shattering the bluestone slabs. He retreated all the way to the wall before stopping, the wall shaking from the impact, dust sifting down.

Whoa!

Yan Xiaosheng opened his mouth, a mouthful of fresh blood gushing out. When he raised his head and exposed his chest, he saw a finger mark on his chest, more than an inch deep, clearly indicating that his breastbone had been directly shattered.

And Yan Xiaosheng hadn't seen Li Miao make a move at all!

At this moment, not only Yan Xiaosheng, but the remaining few martial artists in the room all showed expressions of horror.

Yan Xiaosheng's martial arts were considered top-tier in the martial world. Don't think there are many top-tier masters in the martial world; as long as one is a top-tier master, they are ranked highly in a region at least the size of a province. There aren't too many such people in the world.

These few martial artists didn't riot when the Jinyiwei (Imperial Guards) sealed the door; they were waiting for Yan Xiaosheng to make a move, and then they would all attack together, increasing their chances of success.

But in a flash of lightning, they didn't even have time to gather their energy and stand up before the battle ended.

This couldn't even be called a fight; it was a naked 碾壓.

To be able to casually shatter the breastbone of a first-rate master, and then absorb a palm strike only to send the opponent flying, what terrifying realm had the martial arts of this Jinyiwei Commander, who claimed to have been a scribe for twenty years, reached!?

Even the patriarchs and abbots of giants like Wudang and Shaolin, could they do this?

Then a young Jinyi (Embroidered Clothing) snorted coldly: "Hmph! Does a mantis dare to block a chariot? Do you think the Jinyiwei (Imperial Guards) search the world, and besides our Commander, which other Commander could sit steadily in the capital for twenty years?"

"As long as our Commander is here, even if seventeen or eighteen more madmen like you come, don't even think about stirring up any trouble in this capital!"

"Stop, stop." Li Miao, patting the front of his robe, heard this and waved his hand: "Don't flatter me. I'm just too lazy to go out and endure the sun and rain. My colleagues take care of me and don't make me work hard. All that talk about blocking chariots and sitting steadily, you're giving me goosebumps."

After saying that, he cupped his hands to Yan Xiaosheng: "My subordinates are just joking, Leader Yan, please don't go around spreading rumors."

No one dared to take this as a joke.

Yan Xiaosheng coughed several times, spitting out a mouthful of clotted blood, and said dejectedly, "I've been messing around in this capital for over ten years, and I never knew there was someone like you."

"I've lived in vain for over forty years, thinking I had achieved something through daily hard training. Only today, seeing you, do I realize I was just a frog in a well."

He raised his hand and pointed to the sunken finger mark on his chest: "This finger strike severed my heart meridian. With my cultivation, I can only last exactly three days. Was this also intentional on your part?"

"Coincidence, coincidence." Li Miao said, hands tucked into his sleeves.

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Yan Xiaosheng was silent for a long while before finally speaking: "One hundred taels."

"Don't joke about five or ten taels. I won't ask for much, just give my child one hundred taels so he can have money to settle down, and I'll do as you say."

At this point, his life force was severed, and his only thought was to leave an heir, so his attitude softened. A dying man, without the will to live, could discuss anything.

But Li Miao shook his head, clearly not joking: "Just five taels. Not a single cent more."

"You!"

Yan Xiaosheng's face showed anger. He had been in business for many years; a single cup of tea cost more than five taels of silver. When had he ever cared about such small change? He figured this Jinyiwei Commander, being of high rank and power, must receive far more offerings than him, and wouldn't care about the difference between one hundred and five taels. Was he deliberately humiliating him?

"Didn't I just say, you run brothels and skin trades, abduct people, and engage in forced buying and selling?"

"Not counting what you cheated and swindled, among the people you paid for, I found a mid-range figure." Li Miao spread his hands: "I didn't even count those children you bought for one or two coins. I'm going by your rules, so don't say I'm bullying you."

"This is also why your child hasn't been born and hasn't enjoyed the blessings brought by your sins. Otherwise, I would have directly sold him to a brothel to be a pimp, and the selling price would also be five taels of silver."

"Fair, isn't it?"

"You!" Yan Xiaosheng's fingers trembled, wanting to point at Li Miao, but his hand lifted halfway and then dropped powerlessly.

"Alright. Just five taels." He lost his strength and slowly sat down against the wall.

"Deal!" Li Miao clapped his hands, stood up, and without another glance at Yan Xiaosheng, walked directly out.

He walked past the two unconscious thugs he had thrown out, casually kicked them twice, directly breaking their cervical spines.

The two thugs instantly lost their breath. Fortunately, they died quickly, which was a blessing.

The few martial artists inside the room dared not resist and were locked up by several Jinyiwei (Imperial Guards) and escorted out.

Li Miao walked out the door, hands tucked into his sleeves, and approached the sedan chair.

The young Jinyi (Embroidered Clothing) who had praised him earlier quickly stepped forward and lifted the curtain. Li Miao slipped inside, closed his eyes, and leaned back to rest.

Outside the sedan curtain, the young Jinyi (Embroidered Clothing) quietly asked, "Commander, was that geisha really pregnant?"

"Pregnant with what? That Yan fellow has done nothing but evil his whole life, and he hasn't had a child in decades. How could it be such a coincidence that we caught him?" Li Miao said with his eyes closed, "Someone like him wants to leave an heir?"

The young Jinyi (Embroidered Clothing) scratched his head and chuckled foolishly, "You still have a way, Commander. So how should we deal with his geisha?"

Li Miao paused, then said, "Let her go. When Yan's money arrives, you take a bit out, give it to her to settle down. It'll be like she's escaped a sea of suffering."

"Just give her—one hundred taels."

"Aye." The young Jinyi (Embroidered Clothing) responded, raising his hand to signal the men to set off back to the Lord Commissioner's office. But then he saw Li Miao lift the sedan curtain, his weariness even more apparent, too lazy to even open his eyes. He slumped into the corner of the sedan chair and spoke lazily.

"You all take the men back and report. I'm going back to sleep."

"Ah? Commander, but the Commander is still waiting for you..." The young Jinyi (Embroidered Clothing) looked troubled.

"Who cares about him? I only work four hours a day. This was something I earned with my life back then, and the Commander himself promised it to me. I've given him enough face today."

"If he's unhappy, go under the paperweight on my desk and show him the note he signed back then."

As he spoke, Li Miao's voice grew fainter, mumbling incoherently, "I only... work... eight hours a day..."

He had actually fallen asleep.

The young Jinyi (Embroidered Clothing) was helpless, but he also knew that once their Commander fell asleep, even firecrackers next to his ear wouldn't wake him. He could only give a few instructions to the sedan bearers, telling them to send Li Miao home.

He himself led a team back to the Lord Commissioner's office to face a scolding.

Only the brightly lit tavern remained, with a few corpses and the waiting Yan Xiaosheng.

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