?Pain and suffering.
Those two feelings had always been constant in my life.
The memories of warmth and happiness I last felt decades ago were gradually turning blurry in my head.
My two best friends, who cared for me very much, were the only ones whom I could still vaguely remember in my hazy memory.
Boo and Albion.
They made me feel wanted.
They made me feel happy.
They made me feel alive.
And most of all, they made me feel loved.
“I miss them very much,” I said as I looked at the younger boy whom I suddenly found inside the hazy world that I was in.
I couldn’t tell if I was dreaming or not, for even dreaming had become a luxury that I didn’t possess.
“Then, can you share your memories with me?” the boy asked. “I want to see everything from beginning to end. I want to know everything so that I’ll be able to come up with a plan to save you.”
“Save… me?” I couldn’t help but smile despite the pain I was feeling. “No one can save me. Boo and Albion had tried multiple times. The only way you can save me is if you kill me.”
The boy shook his head before raising his hand to touch the side of my face.
“You’ve been hurt too deeply,” the boy said softly. “You no longer dare to hope because you know that having expectations will only break you. You no longer dare to dream because everything will disappear when you wake up.”
At that moment, I felt something warm and wet slide down the sides of my face. I knew I was crying because this was something that I often did from time to time whenever the pain became too unbearable for me to endure.
Each time I merged with the body of one of those who were called Wanderers by the people of Artem, my dying body would be born anew, only to break down again after ten years.
Unfortunately, I had reached my limit.
This was the last time that I’d acquire a new vessel. After it broke down again, my end would finally come.
Perhaps, this in itself was a blessing.
Ten years. I just need to endure ten more years of pain and suffering.
After that, I will be free…
Although I feel sorry for the young lady whose life would be snuffed out and whose body would be taken over by me, I’m unable to do anything.
I’m unable to stop the process from happening.
I’m no different from a puppet being controlled by a puppeteer to do whatever they wanted with my powers.
“Just kill me,” I stated. “End me. That is the only way you can save me.”
If I were to die, the being using my power to break through into the rank of a Celestial would not be able to reach his goal.
I wanted to die so badly, for that was the only way that I could spite him.
The only way I could make him feel despair like how I endured decades of suffering due to his selfish goal.
“Hey,” the boy said as he raised his other hand to cup my face. “Do you really not want to fight one last time? After the Lunar Eclipse, you will no longer have a chance to do anything. Are you really fine with that kind of ending?”
“Yes,” I replied. “I am already tired. Very tired.”
“Then what about Boo? What about Albion? Even now, they are still planning to save you. Are you sure you don’t want to try one last time for their sake?”
“No. Tell the two of them to escape. The only reason why they are still alive is because the People of Artem are keeping the promise they made to me. As long as I cooperate with them, Boo and Albion will not be killed.”
I knew it already.
My captors looked forward to seeing the desperation on the faces of the two beings who still hadn’t given up on trying to save me.
But, I couldn’t be saved.
The two of them didn’t possess the strength to save me.
“I can tell that you have already given up,” the boy said somewhat sadly. “Fine. You don’t have to do anything except share your memories with me. I will handle the rest.”
The boy then pressed his forehead over my forehead and closed his eyes.
“Share it with me,” the boy stated. “If you do, I promise to save Boo and Albion.”
I didn’t know what kind of face I was making right now, but whatever it was, I believed that I was giving the boy in front of me a look of pity.
But this was just a dream after all, so why not allow him to see the horrors that he would be facing a few weeks from now?
Perhaps on a whim, I decided to cooperate and shared the entirety of my memories with him.
From the time I appeared in Arcadia up to the present.
Decades worth of memories.
Decades worth of suffering and pain.
For some reason, the mere thought of letting the boy in front of me suffer through my memories filled me with glee.
By experiencing my pain and suffering, wouldn’t that make him feel pain and suffering as well?
Why should I be the only one to suffer?
Sharing this suffering was good because it would allow others to feel my pain.
As I finished transferring my memories to the boy, I pulled my head back and observed his face.
I want to see his expression change. I want to know how he would react after seeing my memories.
Would the things I experienced break him?
A part of me didn’t want that to happen, but a part of me wanted it very much.
But, as I waited, and waited… and waited some more, the reaction I was looking for never appeared.
When the boy opened his eyes, he looked at me with a gaze filled with affection, making me feel a stinging pain in my chest.
“You pitiful cannon fodder,” the boy said softly as he pulled me to him and gave me a tight hug. “You’re only a pitiful puppet that is bound by the Strings of Fate and forced to dance for her entertainment.”
The boy then patted my head, making the tears in my eyes fall non-stop.
Yes, I am a pitiful cannon fodder.
Forced to do things against my will.
But soon, it would all end.
I only needed to endure ten more years, and my suffering would finally end.
“Worry not.”
The boy’s words broke me out of my daze.
“You are one of my people. The threads that have bound you, I will cut them all one by one. I will free you from the bindings of Fate, and I will allow you to live a life worth living.”
“And I will promise you one more thing.”
The boy then stood on tiptoe to kiss my forehead before staring straight into my eyes.
“Those who look down on my people.”
“Those who step on their dreams…”
“Those who think that they can brush them off with impunity…”
“Will face the wrath of me, Thirteen.”
The boy smiled and parted the hair that covered my face.
“Thank you, Callie,” the boy said as his body slowly turned into particles of light, slowly disappearing from my sight. “I look forward to meeting you soon.”
As his final words reverberated inside my head, I noticed that the pain that I was feeling in my body had subsided.
It was still there, but it was much more tolerable.
“Thirteen,” I muttered. “He said that his name is Thirteen.”
I didn’t know what happened, but for some reason, I was starting to look forward to returning to the Arcadia Archipelago.
There, Boo and Albion would still be waiting for me.
But, it would no longer be just the two of them.
There was one more person who promised to save me.
I, who no longer dared to hope.
I, who no longer dared to dream.
I, who no longer wished to live, suddenly felt as if someone had reached out to me from another world or dimension.
“Thirteen,” I said softly. “I’ll see you soon, Thirteen.”
With that, I once again closed my eyes. And for the first time in forever, I started to pray to whatever Gods that would listen to my pitiful prayer.
“Please, let my suffering end.”
“Please, let this be the last time.”
I wasn’t aware at that time that, from within the vastness of the multiverse, a wooden staff that was traveling at great speeds hummed as if to answer my call.