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Martial King’s Retired Life

Martial King’s Retired Life

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Volume 2 Chapter 32

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Red Envelope Group of the Three Realms

In a world of shallow-minded, materialistic mortals, what would one from humble beginnings – whose face had been stomped on, spat on, oppressed for the longest while by the arrogant, pampered upper echelons of society – do, when a mysterious application pops up on a brand new phone that was meant to be the birthday gift of an ungrateful girlfriend? What if the application takes the form of a chatroom where its occupants, bearing the names of mythical, fictional beings, start giving out ‘Red Packets’, all the while spouting nonsense?

Volume 2 Chapter 32

I was very surprised to find that I was the first to speak. But what could I do? I couldn't let this girl, I mean, young master Shen get taken advantage of, right? Furthermore, this matter is our… Wait, no. It was all Su Xiao's fault! This wouldn't have had happened if he didn't to retaliate.

Long Zaitian contemptuously scanned the area seemingly looking for the person who just spoke out. He didn't realise that it was me at first glance, but he made eye contact with me the next moment, clearly realising it was me.

We've now met face to face three times now. The first time was when he came to pick a fight with Song Ou, and the second time was back at the Qilin Guards' main courtyard.

But this was the first time we actually had a conversation.

He narrowed his eyes as he looked at me.

"Were you the one who just spoke out?"

What? You want a face-to-face fight?

I looked at Song Ou. He still had a pale face and was still repeating, "Yiren… How could Yiren……" as if he had become retarded. Looks like I can't rely on him to tank this time. I looked at young master Shen and noticed he was full of worry. It looked like he didn't have any idea for how to deal with Long Zaitian. Well, it's only fair. While he's the same age as Boss Shen, Boss Shen has always been the leader between them. His experience and chest couldn't compare to his sister. Hmm… especially his chest.

It looks like I, the gallant knight in shining armour will have to deal with things here.

"Yes, I am the one who spoke out."

"Oh?"

Long Zaitian took a few steps over. He only realised we were similar in height when he got closer, so he had to raise his head to look at me. My height must've made him feel a little pressured so he didn't fly off the handle, and instead asked: "Who are you? What's your name?"

"Hmm, about that… I'm a new recruit constable. My last name is Li."

"Heh! You trying to lie to my face? Your surname is Li? There are only three new recruits at Liu Shan Men: Tang Ye, Su Xiao and Ming Feizhen. I've met Tang Ye and that crazy bitch Su Xiao. You were the one backing Su Xiao back at our main courtyard. Could you be Ming Feizhen?"

"You are mistaken, Captain Long. My surname really is Li."

"You still trying to fool me? So is your surname Li, and first name Laozi? Are you going to mock me now?" Long Zaitian chuckled. He narrowed his eyes and mocked me: "You think you can fool me with something like that? Hmm?"

There's no way I'd use something so simple.

"No, no, no, my first name is the character Ba, from Bashu, except doubled up."

"Hmm?"

Long Zaitian seemed to be confused by what I said, and thought about it.

"Double ba character? What the fuck? If the character ba is doubled up….." Long Zaitian frowned with distrust. He tried to combine the characters in his mind, "Baba?"

"Yes son?"

Everybody around burst out in laughter.

There's no way you can defend against me, Captain Dragon Licking the Ground.

Long Zaitian finally realised his mistake and went completely red in the face. Furious, he drew his sabre. He looked like he was going to explode if he didn't shave my face off on the spot.

"How dare you?! I'll skin you!!"

Didn't you say you wouldn't fall for my tricks? I almost believed you.

Long Zaitian swung his blade at me. I took a step back and raised my hand gently using Taichi with perfect posture, comparable to when I practiced every morning with old Huang.

Long Zaitian paid me no heed, raised his hand to feint and shouted: "Dodge three slashes if you can!"

"Say my name if you're so tough!"

So as to not drag the constables behind me into the fight, I took a big step to the left, and then sprinted a few steps. I was already several yards behind him by the time he slashed down.

"You sure are good at running, you punk! Stand your ground and defend against three of my attacks if you can. If you can survive them, I'll turn around and leave without a word."

Your words, remember that!

But I don't have a weapon.

Hey, hey, can somebody find me a corn cob? I at least need to pretend I'm duelling with him.

On my back was sleeping Su Xiao who was deep asleep. Su Xiao will wake up if I keep moving around. A nice fragrance came from my neck as Su Xiao tightened his arms around my neck. It was as though he wasn't sure what was happening.

"Hmm? What's going on?" Su Xiao looked left and right. He then got alerted and asked: "Why am I back here? Eh? The vice-captain is here too. Eh? Long Zaitian! Eh? B-Big Brother Ming, why are you piggy-backing me?"

"I don't have time to explain to you. Right now, we're in a dangerous situation where we might get turned into meat-buns in three slashes. Can you get off first?"

Su Xiao's mind was still foggy since he had just woken up. After he finished listening to what I said, he quickly buried his small head where my neck was. In a flirtatious and tired tone, he said: "Wake me up when you're done then."

"Is there no end to your indecencies, you bitches?!"

Long Zaitian rambled loudly and went to slash at us.

"Enough! Vice-captain Long, please forgive me for not keeping my subordinates in line." Young master Shen rushed over in a hurry and shouted. He then asked: "But as a top level warrior of the imperial court, how could you be picking a fight with a constable, not to mention the fact that you're acting an unarmed person with a sabre?"

However, young master Kuang's expression changed as soon as he finished speaking.

But it wasn't just him. Even Long Zaitian who was going to continue slashing at me underwent a big change, changing his expression as if he got slashed thrice.

Boss Shen and young master Shen are twins, so their faces looked similar. But no matter how much their faces were identical, their voice couldn't be the exact same, especially since he wasn't like a fifteen year old teenager like Su Xiao. His voice changed a long time ago. He spoke in a high-pitched voice before to imitate his sister, and he indeed resembled her a lot. But he spoke with his real voice just then because he was panicked. While young master Shen's voice is soft and elegant, it was just a little bit deeper than a girl's. Still, it was completely different to Boss Shen's.

Long Zaitian and Song Ou both knew Shen Kuang. With this, they'd be able to know that the beauty before them dressed in a girl's robe was not the Shen Yiren they fought over even if they were stupider. Song Ou finally calmed down and his mood seemed to turn positive.

Long Zaitian on the other hand reacted the opposite way.

Long Zaitian froze up first, and then it looked like his face was set on fire. His face was completely red. While his skin colour was relatively dark to begin with, those by the side could tell that he was distressed. The voices around slowly started to stop, which made him who was standing at the centre even more awkward.

I guess that's perfectly normal. He fought with Song Ou for ages, and even recited a love poem before everyone. But in the end, the person he dedicated the love poem to was not his crush. And as if that wasn't enough, the person he recited the poem to was a damn guy……

Long Zaitian scrunched his face up like he had an epileptic attack. He looked up at the sky like actors in a stage-play going experiencing a pain worse than death and shouted: "My heart! My heart! Why are the heavens treating me so mercilessly?! Why must you trample on a man's love this way?!"

I finally confirmed for myself that the punk was the number one cute-retard of the three offices!

I don't know how much time passed afterwards.

Long Zaitian picked himself and his broken heart up. He shook his head and shook it in a sad fashion: "I'd be willing to go through hell for Miss Shen, yet our love ended like that."

Hey, the female main character in the ending you speak of wasn't even willing to come.

Long Zaitian adjusted his pink robe, took Wen Zhengming's treasured fan back, and scanned all of us. Even an idiot could see that his eyes were filled with the desire for revenge.

Hey, he's gone from embarrassed to angry and now wants to silence us!

"I have no choice then." Long Zaitian slyly thundered: "Since Miss Shen isn't here, there's no need for me to pull any punches." He then pointed at us with his fan and shouted: "Surround these bastards and beat the living daylights out of them!" The three hundred Qilin Guards rushed over as soon as he was done speaking.

That punk had already developed a deep seated hatred for us that couldn't possibly be any more intense back at their courtyard. Actually, he might have developed that deep hatred for Liu Shan Men a few years ago.

Liu Shan Men's constables had only had a short break and had yet to fully recover. However, they were much more determined than before. Not one of them showed a hint of fear as the Qilin Guards closed in. It looks like Liu Shan Men has recovered from their disease. And the credit belongs to Su Xiao alone.

The problem was that there was still a massive gap in skill between Liu Shan Men and the Qilin Guards. There was no hope of beating the three hundred Qilin Guards before.

Su Xiao hopped off my back and shouted: "Watch out everyone. Don't let them surround us!"

He intended to charge into battle after giving his warning, but I grabbed his collar and pulled him back.

Su Xiao looked at me and angrily exclaimed: "Big Brother Ming, why are you stopping me again? Our men aren't useless this time."

"I didn't say they were scared. But there's still no need for you guys to fight them."

I looked at the street in the distance. Under the rays of the moonlight, the sound of horse hooves came closer and closer.

The horse hooves sounded like thunderclap as they trotted without stopping like a war drum. If one were to hear it, their heart would beat more intensely, and a fire would be lit in their chest. It was like a man who had reached the apex of a mountain and had to shout out loud to express his happiness.

The name of the steed was called Caller of the Clouds of Battle. That very steed was the steed of Liu Shan Men's vice-captain, Shen Yiren.

"Liu Shan Men's saviour has already arrived."

Glossary

Baba was written with the characters把拔 which sounds similar to 爸爸 meaning dad. So essentially, MFZ tricked him into calling him "Daddy".

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