Unless the other person's feelings are equally strong, then it's a two-way race... I wish these gravity couples happiness forever. Ming Hai would not do that anyway - unless there was no one to accompany Toyokawa Shoko home, then he would wait until night without hesitation and accompany her to the gate of the mansion. As for now, since her childhood playmate is here, I should go back and wait for her to share today’s fun stories! Thinking of this, Ming Hai was about to leave the convenience store when his cell phone suddenly vibrated. "The practice session will end at about 6:30. Can you wait until then?" It's rare for Toyokawa Shoko to send such a message. "Are you so impatient? I can see that you are really excited..." Ming Hai raised an eyebrow slightly, and a smile appeared on the corner of his mouth. However, just as I clicked on the chat bar to reply, another message popped up.
"The practice will end at about 6:30. Do you want to go eat afterward?" Nagasaki Motoyo also sent a sticker saying "Waiting for you". "..." Ming Hai couldn't laugh anymore. He was silent for a while with a subtle expression, then walked out of the convenience store and looked at the girls who were walking away. Among them, two girls were looking down at their phones from time to time, as if waiting for someone to reply. The difference was that Toyokawa Shoko looked back very covertly, and met his gaze with a smile as he just walked out of the convenience store. Ming Hai felt that there was no smile in her eyes. ...Is this an illusion? How could my gentle, lovely, innocent and cheerful teacher Xiaoxiang look at me with such cold eyes? Ming Hai took a deep breath, lowered his head as if nothing had happened, and sent two messages as quickly as possible. "The gas at home is not turned off. I'm a little anxious, so I'm going home first. Be careful on the road." "The divination says that I shouldn't go out to look for food today. You can go eat by yourself. Be careful on the road." Then raise your head. As expected, the two girls lowered their heads and picked up their phones one after another, confirmed the message, and then looked at each other. Due to the distance, Ming Hai could not confirm what information they exchanged, what thought-provoking expressions they showed, and he was not even sure whether there were sparks in the air. He just understood one thing from this action. "Those two people must have done it on purpose this time... They sent me messages in front of each other, and then watched who I responded to first and how I responded." "Where's the surprise you promised me, Sushi-san? You didn't tell me that this surprise was for me..."
Ming Hai sighed helplessly. Although I felt a bit of a headache, I had already prepared myself mentally, so I didn't care about it to the point where I had to keep up. He walked straight to the station in the opposite direction, and received nonchalant replies from the two girls along the way. Ming Hai, however, had a feeling that he would be very distressed after meeting them in person. …… into the night. As they filed out of the practice room, the atmosphere among [CryCHIC] members seemed a little depressing, as if they had all suffered a collective blow. "Well, that's all for today... Please be careful on your way home, and if possible, let us know in the group that you are safe when you get home." Speaking softly, Toyokawa Shoko looked at Takamatsu Deng who was keeping his head down and keeping silent, with a hint of heartache and self-blame in her eyes. When the others went their separate ways home, she asked her childhood playmate who was following her to leave first, and she followed the depressed gray-haired girl onto the overpass. Gao Songdeng put his hands on the railing, looked down at the traffic below, his breathing trembled slightly, and he gradually pursed his lips. "Why, me?" "I've already explained the reason. Since these are the lyrics written by Deng, it would be best if he himself sang them." With her hands on her lower abdomen, Shoko Toyokawa looked at her with a smile, hoping to encourage her with a positive and proactive attitude. Gao Songdeng didn't look up, his mood was still as depressed. “But I can’t sing at all…” "You're just not used to singing in front of others. Just sing a few more times and you'll get used to it and it won't be a problem." Toyokawa Shoko shook her head and looked at her seriously. "Teng-san's lyrics are the cry of your heart. Apart from you, I don't think anyone else can convey those lyrics perfectly and let the audience hear the elegant voice that belongs to us and you." "The...cry of the soul?" Gao Songdeng looked up in a daze, and the meaning of [CryCHIC] once again emerged in her mind. "And I'm not the only one who thinks so." Toyokawa Shoko suddenly took out her cell phone, made a call, turned on the speakerphone function and placed it between the two of them. The gentle and elegant male voice lit up like a lamp in the cool evening breeze. "Good evening, Takamatsu-san." Takamatsu Deng blinked, looking a little surprised: "Mr. Ming Hai?" "It's me." He said in a relaxed tone, "I know everything. How was it? It was your first time singing in front of everyone. It must be scary, right?" "……Um." She nodded, even though he couldn't see it. "I...it's hard to make any sound when there are a lot of people around, let alone sing."
After a pause, Gao Songdeng clenched his hands, turned around abruptly, and mustered up the courage to speak into the phone. "Mr. Narumi, I, what should I do?" - This chapter is two in one. Volume 42: Chapter Chapter On the overpass, they all wanted to become human "Good question." The voice on the phone smiled and said, "Even though you knew you really couldn't sing in front of everyone, your first reaction was not to escape, but to ask me what to do... Just based on this, Takamatsu-san, you are a very qualified lead singer." Gao Songdeng was a little confused. He didn't expect that there would be such an angle of understanding, but it didn't seem like he was forcing himself to find reasons to comfort himself. This made her feel like she was climbing up a little bit from the bottom of the valley. "There's a huge difference between not daring to do something and not wanting to do it." Ming Hai smiled and explained as if he knew what she was thinking, "Although Toyokawa pushed you to the position of lead singer 'once again' without your consent, you didn't run away or complain. Instead, after trying seriously, you decided that you were not suitable for this position and became depressed." "Don't you think it's amazing? If it were me, I would have asked Toyokawa-san to find someone else long ago. I wouldn't have cared about whether I was hindering the band or disappointing everyone." "is that so……" Gao Songdeng tilted his head slightly and blinked dazedly. The original depressed and gloomy look was unconsciously replaced by a confused expression, and he was no longer just looking down at the ground. As for Toyokawa Shoko next to him, she understood the emphasis in his words, and her smile couldn't help but become a little more bitter and helpless - she was already prepared to be blamed and taught a lesson by him later. But he habitually mixed a lie into his words of comfort to Deng... The girl looked away to hide her eyes which were gentler than the night. "That's it." Ming Hai said in a resounding voice: "You don't know what to do anyway, right? Then throw away those unnecessary self-blame and inferiority complex, and just do what I say." "Ah, yes!" Gao Songdeng nodded vigorously subconsciously, staring at the phone seriously. He suddenly smiled and said, "Okay, let's discuss the topic of 'How should people with social anxiety sing loudly'." "Social phobia... me?" Unconsciously drawn by his relaxed tone, Gao Songdeng really put aside those negative emotions and focused on the conversation with him without distraction. "That's right, but strictly speaking, Takamatsu-san, who brought someone into his house on their first meeting, shouldn't be considered socially anxious." “What is the definition of social phobia?” "Social phobia. As for Takamatsu-san, he's just not good at dealing with humans, but he doesn't dare to show it, right?" "Well... ever since I was a kid, I've felt like I've been living a life that's out of touch with the environment... I don't know what I should do to be like everyone else..." "So, there is the song 'Want to Become a Human'?"
"..." After a pause, he slowly spoke: "Because my ideas are different from everyone else's, because I can't naturally integrate into the group, and because once I speak, I will become an alien..." "You don't dare to hold your head high and communicate with everyone because you are afraid of becoming even more lonely, Takamatsu-san, right?" Although it was a question, the tone was extremely affirmative. "..." Gao Songdeng slowly widened his eyes and opened his mouth slightly, but he didn't know what to say. ——Because everything I wanted to say has already been said by him. She could only stare at the phone in a daze, listening to the sound of her heartbeat becoming increasingly clear in her chest, and a faint star-like light seemed to light up in her eyes. Then, Ming Hai made the conclusion without question: "That is to say - Takamatsu-san, you are unique." Even though the traffic under the overpass was extremely noisy, it could not shake his clear and bright voice, which penetrated deeply into Gao Songdeng's mind. "unique……?" The girl's lips moved and she uttered a breath-like murmur. Even though no one heard it, Ming Hai continued to speak confidently. “Don’t think of yourself as an outlier, and don’t erase your individuality just to fit in with the group. Just like the gold glittering in the sand, face up to your own unique value.” "As long as it doesn't hurt anyone, it's proof of the existence of 'Tōdō Takamatsu'." Boom! The sound of a schoolbag falling to the ground was heard. Unconsciously clutching the clothes on his chest, Gao Songdeng took a step forward and tried to squeeze out a sound from his throat: "But, I don't want to be unique..." "I gave my friends gifts they didn't like, I couldn't join their chats, and when everyone was crying, I was the only one who couldn't shed a single tear... I don't want that kind of loneliness of being excluded, that kind of proof of existence that only brings pain!" "Can you do that?" With just a few words, her unconsciously excited shouting was completely cooled down, and her breathing was frozen at the same time. And he remained calm: "Takamatsu-san, can you do this?" "Put on a mask, fake a smile, and erase your self. Just like...some people, even if you have to endure pain that cannot be understood by others, even if you have to carefully observe the air every minute and every second, even if you gradually forget what your true self looks like." "Even so, do you want to fit in and become 'part of the crowd' so you're no longer alone?" Gao Songdeng trembled slightly and lowered his eyes which were filled with tears. She couldn't say anything.
"You can't do that, can you?" After a moment of silence, Ming Hai said gently: "It is precisely because you can't do it that you are Takamatsu Deng." "It is precisely because we cannot easily abandon ourselves that something like self is so precious." The cold evening breeze swept across the overpass. Gao Songdeng bit his lips, lowered his head and clenched his fists, and his tears and sobs fell to the ground. "So, am I destined to be alone like this? If I change myself and become a human, it will become painful, but if I don't change myself, I will still be the same as before..."