"You can rest today. I still need to prepare my toolkit for the experiments." She gave me a smile, perhaps the only smile without any mockery, and walked out.
I stood dumbfounded, stranded in a glass tube like an animal, in a place I've never been to, by a person I never knew.
As Roxanna walked away, I felt something inside me snap.
The way she looked at me, treated me…like I wasn't even a person.
There has to be something I must do. I don't know what. So, I let my emotions get the better of me.
"Hey!"
I shouted, my anger overcoming my fear.
Roxanna paused, but she didn't turn around.
"Do you believe no one will hold you accountable?" I asked through gritted teeth.
"Oho." Roxanna's amused voice rang out. "Who will?"
"The military academy!" My voice quivered. It was the academy's dean who sold me off!
B-But! If I disappear for so long, then—
Roxanna covered her mouth and chuckled. "To everyone in the academy, you disappeared since you picked a very secretive mission. Soon, you'll die in that mission. It doesn't matter if they want to believe it or not, because no one will have any evidence."
'W-What!'
I felt the anger in my heart subsiding, but it wasn't down yet.
I wasn't down yet!
"The military!"
"Oh girl, Evander is the high general of Earth and he's the one who sent you here. He covered up everything." Roxanna shrugged.
I could only see her back as she was facing the door, but I saw her shoulders shaking.
…She was laughing.
She was enjoying this.
Enjoying crushing my hopes.
But like a fool that didn't know when to give up, like a moth rushing to fire, I still held out hope.
By now, however, even I could hear my own desperation.
"T-The Xanders! The guardians of Earth!" Like a drowning man clutching onto the last piece of straw, I desperately clung to my last hope.
Roxanna fell silent.
The spark in my heart blossomed into a fire of hope. Yeah, the Xanders are praised by the public as guardians of the earth.
Even in Varian's room, there were many pictures and interviews of the Xander patriarchs, including the current one.
They're the strongest group on earth, if they notice this, then—
"Pfffft."
A burst of laughter interrupted my train of thought.
"Ha! Hahahaha!" Roxanna clutched her stomach and bent down, unable to control her own laughter.
I…I felt cold for some reason.
Even though she didn't speak, the fire of hope in my heart was extinguished like a weak flame on a winter's night.
…What followed was cold and darkness.
I wrapped my arms around myself to feel a tiny bit of warmth. I felt none. All I could do was lean against the glass tube and hope for this nightmare to end.
Roxanna finally turned around. The corner of her eyes had small teardrops. There was a big smile on her face.
But the way she looked at me hadn't changed.
I felt it clearly more than before.
A specimen.
She saw me as a specimen.
Like how you would see an animal in a zoo, or worse, an animal in a butcher shop.
"I forgot to introduce myself." She said in a dignified voice and tapped on her comm.
A huge hologram appeared, showing a man and a woman.
Even though I expected something like this, I didn't really expect this!
With an open mouth, I looked at Sovereign Julius standing together with Roxanna and….Charles Xander?!
Charles was a famous second-year cadet that even I knew of but didn't interact with.
But I'd have never guessed he had this crazy woman as his mother. No, she mentioned her nephew earlier.
"I'm his aunt," Roxanna said, seemingly realizing the misunderstanding.
Her voice turned sinister as she cackled. "That makes me the sister of Julius."
Plop!
My knees gave in and I collapsed to the ground. My gaze blurred and despair finally enveloped me.
It finally hit me and when it did, I had to fight hard to hold my tears.
"As I said, you'll have a day of rest. Today is day zero. We can start tomorrow." Roxanna said in the same voice and walked off.
I wrapped my arms around my knees and curled myself up.
When I was sure that Roxanna was gone, I couldn't hold back the tears streaming down my face.
I cried.
I felt like the orphan girl I once was.
All alone. Without anyone to call my own.
It was a lonely feeling.
As I shut my eyes tight, the lines between reality and dream blurred. I fell asleep, but I found myself in a place I fondly remember.
It was a small, modest orphanage.
<<Good Days Orphanage>>
Where I grew up ever since I knew I could remember.
It wasn't a pleasant memory though.
When I was young, no one would talk to me. I was excluded from the groups. The girls hated me, the boys detested me.
I was the loner.
After living for nearly nine years in the same orphanage, I couldn't make a single friend.
Then I saw him.
He appeared out of nowhere.
Out of the big crowd, he approached me.
I was surprised. Whenever someone tried to approach me, both the girls and boys spread bad rumors about me.
Everyone turned away from me.
But he didn't.
He looked at me and said with a serious face.
"You. Come with me and I'll protect you forever."
I looked at him with a mix of curiosity and amusement. Even though I was a child, I wasn't that naive.
After what I went through in my childhood, I had a hard time trusting people.
So, I decided to grow up in the orphanage, go to school, become an awakener and by the time I graduate college, I'd be far away from this orphanage. A ll N OVE L FU LL . c 0m
Even though this boy who's nearly my age looked a bit interesting, I didn't intend to change my decision.
"Let's talk." He said, in an adult's tone and walked to a secluded place. I ended up smiling at his actions and followed him anyway.
"Let's drop the act. Mom asked me to select someone to live with me. You are alone and likely ostracized here because other girls think you're too cute and spread some bad things about you. So, no one adopts you."
My smile froze and I looked at him once again.
I couldn't tell what I was feeling, but I knew that someone finally understood me. Even though he has never seen me before, never talked to me, he understood me.
"But this also means you, more than anyone, perfectly know the value of companionship. If I have to spend my time with someone, I'll spend it with someone who knows its value."
His words weren't childish anymore.
In fact, I wholeheartedly agree with every word he said. I know the value of companionship more than anyone here because I never had it.
I never had someone I could laugh with, someone to console me when I cry.
I was all alone.
That's why, when he said those words, my resolve to remain alone wavered.
If, and only if he really meant what he said, then would I still want to grow up all alone?
"What if we get into fights? Will you ask your mom to disown me?" I asked, a bit of fear oscillating in my voice.
"Of course not!" The boy shook his head fiercely. "My mom thinks I need someone to not feel lonely, but I think she needs someone to spend time with when I spend all day training!"
Training all day?
I raised a brow at him and only then did I notice the small scars around his hand.
There was medicine applied to these scars meaning they were new and would soon disappear.
But looking at the same small scars on both his arms, including his legs, I was convinced he wasn't lying.
I was about to ask him another question when he continued.
"Besides, disowning you would leave a stain on my autobiography. What would people say when they read the Chronicles of the Peerless Savior Emperor and realize he forced his mom to disown a little girl? I won't risk my reputation." He patted his chest and looked genuinely serious.
"Pffft—" All the questions, all the enquires, all the fear I had were blown into smoke and I ended up laughing.
This guy…is he really serious?
"Hahaha."
I don't remember the last time I laughed like this.
But I don't need to.
Wiping the tears at the corner of my eyes, I looked at him earnestly. If I stayed with him, I don't need to remember when I last laughed.
I would be laughing every day.
"Pfft. Peerless, Savior, and Emperor—those are the three titles reserved for this era's heroes and you want them all?" I asked, wondering what he'd say.
"When I'm crowned, I'll have you by my side and let you witness everything. Let's see how will you laugh at me then." He said with a smug face.
Oh, he's so cute!
But deep down, compared to the pessimistic me, I liked his optimism. No, I longed to be like him.
If I can grow up with him…
"Alright, I believe in you. One last thing, how will we solve our fights?" I asked him with a smile.
As I waited for his response, a sweet and caring voice sounded.
"Then make a promise. Whatever reason you got into fights for, you must understand the other person's reasons and makeup with them."
A woman appeared behind the boy. She looked like him and I presumed her to be his mom.
"Mom! We're talking…"
The boy and his mom bickered lightly.
I watched their conversation and before I knew it, I realized the heavy feeling in my chest.
I too…want someone to treat me like that.
The reason I decided to be alone wasn't that I didn't want this relationship, but because I was scared they would leave me once I come to cherish them.
But if it's this much happiness, then it is worth all the risk.
Even if it's gonna hurt when they leave, the memories will stay with me.
"So, girl." The woman looked at me with a kind smile. Her hair gently swayed in the wind.
I looked up at her.
Then I felt a warm hand on my head. She gently brushed my hair and smiled at me.
"Will you make the promise?"
I don't know why, but for some reason, I had the urge to cry. But before I could answer, the boy bickered with her and sent her away.
Then, he looked at me.
I felt nervous, but I cheered myself up.
"Then let's make a promise." He extended his left pinky.
I extend mine and we locked fingers.
"I promise if I ever get into a fight with him (her), I'll understand his (her) reasons and makeup with him (her)."
Just like that, the promise that would define our childhood and perhaps even our life far into the future was made.
I wondered how my life would change after I move in with…what was his name again?
Wait…
Now that I thought about it, we never—
"I forgot something." The boy coughed lightly and tried to maintain his serious face. But he couldn't stop the blush on his cheeks. "I'm Varian. You are?"
I couldn't help smiling.
Who would ask names at the end? We talked about our future, and even made a promise but didn't even know each other's names.
It was weird. But I liked it.
"I'm Sia," I said with a bright smile.
The two suns set and our shadows stretched into the distance and overlapped.
Then.
The world spun and I woke up.
The dream was over and I found myself back in the harsh reality.
Standing up, I looked at my pinky finger and bit my lip. The iron taste of blood reminded me of well, blood.
But of Varian's blood.
Of all the blood and sweat he shed during his training. Of how he pushed himself without ever retreating.
I looked out again.
In this giant lab, I was all alone.
But now, I don't feel alone anymore.
Despite our fights, despite our separation, despite the pain…I want to see him. I will try to make him understand if that is even possible.
But I won't give up!
I channeled my gravity power.
I didn't shed tears anymore.
Instead, I raised my fists, ready to shed blood.