Chapter 209 (Part 1) Love is in sky of affection (8)
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Epilogue
I’m the most insignificant and unremarkable servant of Nan Feng. I entered the palace at the age of eleven. I’ve already lived in this palace for sixty years.
When I said this, you should know my age. I’m already seventy-one years old. No one was older than me among the servants of the palace. Those who entered the palace with me had already became earth and dust. Only I was left and was still living in this world to enjoy the sunrise, sunset and the rise and fall of the tide. And also continue to live with this dynasty.
When the people of the palace saw me, they would respectfully call me eunuch Fu. Even when the head of the eunuch of the emperor saw me, he would need to give me some face. From their eyes, I saw respect and fear. The late emperor said that this was something I deserved. So, I enjoyed all of these as it should by the rights.
I liked to bask in the sun. Every day I would go to the yard and sat on the rocking chair while enjoying the warmth of the sun. Only when seeing the sun rise from the east, I can be sure that I have lived another day.
The late emperor abdicated. I originally wanted to follow the late emperor, but the emperor said I’m old and let me enjoy a life in retirement inside the palace. I knew that the late emperor did it for my own good. Staying at the late emperor’s side for so many years, I can tell the truth and lies from the late emperor’s words and body language.
However, although knowing that the late emperor really did it for my own good, I still felt sad. Because, I’m old and couldn’t serve the late emperor anymore. Looking at him leave with little master Feng Huang, I felt emptiness in my heart. The little prince who I accompanied for so many years had grown up and would never need me anymore.
Fortunately, the new emperor was very good to me. Every time when he saw me, he wouldn’t let me kneel. Instead, he repeatedly called me eunuch Fu, making me unable to bear this blessing.
Every time when I saw the new emperor, I would be absentminded for a moment. That pair of purple eyes of the new emperor let me think about many, many things of the past.
Speaking of it, I also saw the new emperor grow up. When the late emperor brought this child to the palace, I knew the late emperor’s decision. In the whole life of the late emperor, he had only loved three women.
The first one naturally was empress Jingde. She was the birth mother of the late emperor. Her name was Miao Chu Yun. She was a beautiful, gentle and pitiful woman.
The second one was the woman in the north. I’m only a servant and couldn’t be presumptuous to guess the late emperor’s mind. However, I knew that the late emperor’s heart would contain that woman called Feng Qi Qi for his whole life even till death. Unfortunately, in this world, there wasn’t always a reward for hard work and it wasn’t that I love you, you would also love me. The late emperor inherited empress Jingde’s infatuation with love. In the end, he guarded that woman for so many years.
Until…the appearance of the third woman.
Although, in the eyes of many people, I’m a rare case. Aside from the title of eunuch Fu, I don’t have any other characteristics. However, they had forgotten that in such a cold and heartless palace, I was able to live here for sixty years was already enough to explain my ability.
For example, I understand the preferences of the masters. I knew what I should say and what I shouldn’t say. For example, I have a very good memory. I can remember many things and many scenes.
Just like, when I think back about the past, when I saw that master for the first time, that scene would immediately jump in my mind and couldn’t go even if I wanted it to go.
The late emperor wasn’t tempted by women’s charms. This was a well-known fact through whole Nan Feng. Everyone was envious and jealous of Gu Yun Yao. She was the only woman at the late emperor’s side. The late emperor abolished the harem that had lasted for hundreds of years for her. He expressed that there would be no consorts in the six palaces and that at his side there would only be this woman.
The world said that the late emperor was love-struck man. Everyone didn’t understand why he didn’t give her the status of empress since he was infatuated with her and why he only let her stay at his side as a consort.
There had been multiple discussion about this matter among the people. In the end, everyone agreed that the late emperor was being like this because he didn’t want to ruin the relationship between him and Gu Yun Yao. If she was made the empress, a relationship without love the emperor and empress would only be bound by interests. The late emperor wasn’t willing lost the woman he loved. So, he never allowed her to sit on that position that overlooked all the living beings.
When I told this to the late emperor, the late emperor didn’t say anything. His expression remained the same. It was just, I knew that in the late emperor’s heart, he left that place for a dream that he longed for but couldn’t reach. Inside the late emperor’s heart, only that woman was qualified to sit on that position. That woman was the forever pain in the late emperor’s heart.
Speaking of that woman, I had to talk about the two most legendary characters on the mainland…Lian gongzi and Guanghua gongzi.
These two people, one had high medical skills, the other very wealthy. However, only a handful people knew that these two people were the same person. It was the woman I just talked about…Feng Qi Qi.
She was a woman who possessed myriad of favors. Under the heavens, there was no one more noble and beautiful than her.
However, the nobleness and beauty didn’t let this woman be prideful. On the contrary, she was kind and friendly, making people feel close to her and didn’t dare to blaspheme her beauty.
The most important woman in the late emperor’s heart was her. From when the late emperor encountered her when he was twenty to the next twenty years, she had been the cinnabar mole of the late emperor’s chest that couldn’t be touched because the moment it was touched, it would hurt.
I once hoped that the late emperor could battle bravely for the beauty and write an announcement of war to that proud man. The late emperor had also thought about this. However, when he saw that woman cuddle gently with that man and smile like he had never seen before, the late emperor knew that he was a step too late.
Once, when the late emperor was drunk, he said to me, “One misstep, every following step would also be misstep.” Seeing the late emperor like that, my heart ached for him. He was the most magnanimous man I’ve ever seen. He didn’t hide his love for Feng Qi Qi and also told Feng Cang if he (FC) did her any wrong, he (MYC) would take her away and take good care of her.
It was just, Feng Cang didn’t give the late emperor such an opportunity. They were lovey-dovey and had many children. And, the late emperor could only wait outside every time that woman gave birth and leave when he heard that the mother and child were safe.
Many times, I felt injustice for the late emperor. Ever since empress Jingde passed away and the late emperor was sent to Xi Qi as hostage, I had always been by the late emperor’s side. I looked at how he grew up, how he matured, how he learned to cover his heart and how he learned to scheme and calculate. I took care of the late emperor like he was my own child. I didn’t expect that the heart of the child I cared for would one day be hurt.
It was reasonable to say that I should take revenge for the late emperor and help him recapture that woman, but I couldn’t do it.
It was because I understand the late emperor too well. I knew that the position of Feng Qi Qi in the late emperor’s heart was non-substitutable. If I let her cry, the late emperor would kill me without care about our relationship of so many years. I’m not afraid of the death. I was afraid that if I’m death, no one would take care of the late emperor as dedicated as me.
Moreover, I wished for the late emperor to be happy. To the late emperor, if that woman was happy, he would be happy. If I ruined that woman’s happiness, she would be sad. The late emperor would be even sadder. I didn’t want the late emperor to be sad. He had met with many difficulties in his life and was already unfortunate enough. I couldn’t deprive him of the little happiness left in his heart.
So, I stood behind the late emperor and watched him be delighted, happy, sad and sorrowful for that woman, but I was powerless and couldn’t do anything for the late emperor.
You see, I’m already old. When I reminisced, I would have many emotions and had forgotten to talk about the main thing.
What I talked about, the third woman among the three women that the late emperor cared the most about was related to that woman. Her name is Feng Huang. She is Feng Qi Qi and Feng Cang’s daughter.
When Feng Huang was born, the late emperor was already twenty-six. That time, I was sick. The late emperor empathized with me and let me stay at the palace. He took the new emperor to the Number one village under Heavens; that is, the place where Feng Qi Qi was.
That time, when the late emperor came back, I saw a kind of light from the late emperor’s body. It was something I’ve never seen before.
“Fu Er, she had given birth to a daughter. The mother and daughter are safe.”
From the late emperor’s voice I could hear his happiness. That afternoon, the late emperor told me a lot about this newly born little girl. I heard that she had a pair of black eyes and was as nimble as Feng Qi Qi. I heard that she liked the late emperor very much. She played for a long time in the late emperor’s arms. I heard that when the late emperor left, little Feng Huang cried miserably, making the late emperor’s heart almost stop beating.
“Fu Er, she is closer to me than she is to Feng Cang. I finally turned the tables.”
When the late emperor said this, his words were full of childishness. It seemed that this was the first time that the late emperor was so proud and elated ever since Feng Cang occupied Feng Qi Qi’s heart. Little Feng Huang liked this uncle more than her father. When the late emperor described Feng Cang’s ugly face to me, he laughed twice loudly. That was the hearty laugh I haven’t heard in a long time. At that time, I put the name ‘Feng Huang’ in my heart.
Speaking of it, Feng Cang and Feng Qi Qi, this couple was really too domineering. It seemed that there wasn’t a more noble couple than them in this world. So, when they named their children, they were also domineering.
The eldest son, also the new emperor Feng Xiao was like his name. The new emperor is the chief of the Qiang tribe and his skills at the gu was unparalleled. When his mouth went up, he would give a lofty quality of overlooking the common people, making him (Fu Er) couldn’t help but sigh that this name was very well given to him.
Second son Long Yin Qi and third son Long Yin Lin, combined are called the ancient Chinese animal ‘qilin’. The two brothers are twins. Their looks couldn’t be distinguished. The only differences were the cinnabar mole and the deep purple eyes. There were only very few people under the heavens that haven’t heard of these two names. The two were dragons among people and matched with the name qilin.
As for little master Feng Huang, I don’t have to say, you can see that this name was domineering. Feng Huang, Feng Huang, only this couple would come up with such a mad name. Fortunately, Feng Huang had a uniquely nickname…Long Er. Although, this name was also very domineering, but compared to Feng Huang, it was a lot more reserved.
When little master Feng Huang was born, consort Jin had already passed away. The late emperor never took any more consorts. The harem remained empty. Although, the officials remonstrated even though they could face death, but the late emperor turned a blind eye and ignored those voices. Everyone said that the emperor of Nan Feng was love-struck, and no one could be compared to him. How could they know that the dead woman had changed her name and surname and had gone far away with her lover?
This was the late emperor’s promise to Gu Yun Yao. Marrying her was also a diversionary tactic to confuse the people. Consort Jin was also like her title. She strictly abode to the agreement with the emperor until when she met the one she loves.
I originally thought that after some years of getting along together, the late emperor would be somewhat unwilling to let her go. After all, whether it was inside or outside the palace, consort Jin was his only woman. However, when Gu Yun Yao said that she wanted to leave, the late emperor didn’t show any other expression or nostalgia. With a stroke of a brush, he gave her happiness.
I always thought that the late emperor was a gentle person. Although, on the process of reforming the country, he was bold and decisive and didn’t show the slightest amount of leniency, but in his heart, he still kept the pureness of empress Jingde. That was why he was able to let go when he met the woman he loved and would give the woman at his side happiness when she left.
The first time when little master Feng Huang came to the palace was when she was seven years old.
At that time, the late emperor was already over thirty. Because he didn’t take in consorts and the officials were worried about the issue of the heirs, the late emperor made the new emperor the crown prince. After talking so much, I still didn’t introduce the new emperor’s name. His name is Feng Xiao. He’s Feng Qi Qi and Feng Cang’s eldest son.
When the court saw that the emperor wanted to make someone irrelevant the crown prince and that Nan Feng would fell into the hands of others, they all presented memorials of objection to the emperor. This matter was also used by people with ulterior motives. A small wave appeared in the country.
Towards those faint and probing power, the late emperor swept over them like thunder. The officials also shut their mouth because of those blood. The late emperor had been gentle for too long. They had all forgotten what kind of person the late emperor was.
From then on, no one questioned the decision of the late emperor. Feng Xiao steadily became the crown prince.
The late emperor didn’t seek Feng Cang and Feng Qi Qi’s opinion on this matter. Instead, he directly asked Feng Xiao what he thought about it. That child, no, the new emperor only returned one sentence at that time, “It seemed that it would be fin!” The late emperor knew then that he (FX) agreed.
After Feng Xiao became the crown prince, Feng Huang came to Nan Feng to see her big brother.
At that time, I saw little master Feng Huang for the first time. When she, dressed in white, run laughingly over to here, I obviously felt that the late emperor’s body trembled slightly.
Little master was completely a miniature version of that woman. Whether it was a laugh, a scowl, anger or displeasure, it was the appearance of that woman. It was indeed…her flesh and blood!
When I saw little master Feng Huang, I looked at the late emperor with some worries. From his eyes, I saw astonishment. Aside from astonishment I didn’t saw any other emotion. At that time, I let out a sigh of relief. I was worried that the late emperor would transfer his love from Feng Qi Qi to little master Feng Huang who looked the same as her. However, it seemed that I thought too much. The late emperor wasn’t like that.
Chapter 209 (Part 2) Love is in sky of affection (8)
The late emperor raised little master Feng Huang like his daughter and spoiled her to the heavens.
I had never seen the late emperor pamper and indulge a person so much. He held little master Feng Huang in his arms, allowing her to see a farther scenery in a higher position. He stripped the lychee and fed it into little master Feng Huang’s red lips.
Because little master Feng Huang liked white, he ordered people to weave silk that was softer than the clouds to make new clothes for little master Feng Huang.
In short, the emperor put all his indulgence on little master Feng Huang. He even wanted to make little master Feng Huang a princess, but was rejected by little master Feng Huang. At that time, little master Feng Huang said one sentence. The late emperor didn’t pay attention, but I listened to it with my heart.
“Ming Yue Cheng, I don’t want to be a princess! A princess is too far away from you!”
The late emperor saw these words as being childish, but I saw a certain thing from little master Feng Huang’s eyes. At that time, my heart shook a bit, but when little master Feng Huang looked at me, I lowered my head.
Little master Feng Huang was very satisfied with my performance. She willfully enjoyed the indulgence of the late emperor and wrote a letter to her parents saying that she liked Nan Feng and wanted to stay here.
I don’t what Feng Qi Qi would think after she read that letter. I’m afraid that she and Feng Cang may not know that their seven-year-old daughter had fallen in love with the late emperor. Light flashed inside that pair of clear eyes. Aside from I, this outsider, who can see thoroughly, even the late emperor didn’t take notice.
Little master Feng Huang stayed in the palace for eight years.
Eight years were like a shuttle. Little master Feng Huang had grown from a little girl to a slender and elegant woman.
At that time, Feng Qi Qi no longer showed her face to the world. The title of the number one beauty went from princess to Ming Yue to Feng Qi Qi, and then fell on little master Feng Huang.
Although, she was only fifteen years old, little master Feng Huang has become a famous beauty in the mainland. She was pure as the dew on the green leaves in the morning and clean like the snowdrops on the top of the sky. Everyone who saw little master Feng Huang would become intoxicated by her gentle laughter and affectionate voice.
Like her mother, she had an eye-catching charm and a modesty that couldn’t be found in the nobility.
The good name of little master Feng Huang became known to all as she grew older and became the object of love of the young masters.
“Ming Yue Cheng, I don’t like those men!” Little master Feng Huang was gentle. Her face would only change at one moment; that was, when someone confessed to her. Every time when little master Feng Huang say this sentence, the late emperor would rub her head gently and ask affectionately, “What kind of man does Long Er like? I will find him for you!”
“I like you!”
Little master Feng Huang had always been straightforward. I still remember the first time she said that. The late emperor was startled at first and then laughed out loudly, “Long Er, I’m already old.”
Two hidden meanings were revealed with the late emperor saying this. The first one was that he already knew the love little master Feng Huang had towards him. The second was that he wouldn’t accept the feelings of little master Feng Huang.
Such an answer, how could someone as clever as little master Feng Huang not know the hidden meaning? However, her answer was even more surprising, “Ming Yue Cheng, I wouldn’t give up!”
If someone asked me, what will happen when two people with a strong will collide, I would tell him that, that was a test of the heart and the affection. It would be the same struggle as running a long-distance marathon. It would be…rocked by a major disaster!
On little master Feng Huang’s sixteenth birthday, I saw Feng Qi Qi again. When she stood together with little master Feng Huang, her age couldn’t be told. Those who didn’t know would think that they were a pair of twin sisters.
Those who came with Feng Qi Qi were her husband and sons. Their family was riunited in the palace of the late emperor.
To be able to see Feng Qi Qi, the late emperor was very happy. The smile on the late emperor’s mouth didn’t disappear for the whole night. When this scene fell on little master Feng Huang’s eyes, it clearly became a pain.
That night, the late emperor got drunk. I served at his side. Deep in the night, little master Feng Huang suddenly came over. She was dressed thinly and lay next to the late emperor. I was so shocked that I almost screamed. She firstly hit my pressure point, making me unable to move.
“Why won’t you take one more glance at me? We’re only twenty-six years apart! Why wouldn’t you accept me?”
Little master Feng Huang snuggled in the arms of the drunken late emperor. She looked pitiful like a child. Her appearance and her tearful voice made me feel heartache.
“When the emperor was born, I wasn’t born yet. When I was born, the emperor is already old. However, I don’t care. I don’t care at all!”
Just when little master Feng Huang wanted to kiss the late emperor, the late emperor opened his eyes and stopped her ‘absurd’ behavior.
“Long Er, from the start till now, my heart only has your mother. She’s the love of my life and also the only woman that I love. You once asked me why the harem was empty. I didn’t answer you. Now, I will tell you, I once promised your mother, the position of the empress will always be reserved for her.”
“Long Er, you are only a child in my eyes. I can’t be together with your mother, but I treated you and your brothers as my children. I only love you dearly, but it’s not the love between a man and a woman.”
“Long Er, you should find a young man to love you and not cling to me!”
I feel that the words of the late emperor were a bit cruel to little master Feng Huang. That treasure that the late emperor held in his hands, tears fell from her eyes for the first time in my memory.
“I know you love my mother, but I won’t give up. Here has me!” Little master Feng Huang put her hand on the late emperor’s chest. “You have me in your eyes and in your heart. You can lie to me, but you can’t lie to yourself!”
After saying this, little master Feng Huang ran out barefooted.
“Long Er…” If it was in the past, the late emperor would definitely chase after her. The night was dark, the wind was strong and little master Feng Huang ran barefooted, the late emperor would definitely be worried about her. However, this time, the late emperor only called little master Feng Huang’s nickname once but didn’t chase after her.
“Fu Er, did I do wrong?”
The late emperor asked me, but my pressure point was hit. I couldn’t make a sound. Even after my pressure point was released, I couldn’t answer this question to the late emperor. After all, I’m not the involved party. I didn’t have anything to do with this and couldn’t feel all the emotions of this matter. Naturally, I couldn’t say anything about this.
After that night, little master Feng Huang left a letter and left without saying goodbye. The letter only said that she wanted to travel through the mainland to let herself become mature. However, I obviously saw an emotion called heart-tearing pain on the late emperor’s face.
In the days that followed, little master Feng Huang would sent letters every three days. It was still the handwriting that the late emperor was familiar with. The content was nothing more than where she had gone to and what she saw. It was just, at the end of each letter, little master Feng Huang would write a sentence, “Wait for me to come back.”
This kind of thing had been going on for a year. Suddenly, little master Feng Huang didn’t send more letters. For a long time, she didn’t write a letter.
During that time, I obviously was able to detect that the emperor was not right. When he was reading the memorials, he would immediately raise his head when he heard footsteps. He wanted to know if it was the eunuch who brought little master Feng Huang’s letter. The repeatedly disappointment made the late emperor’s face graver and also made him thinner.
Little master Feng Huang disappeared like that out of nowhere. Even her family didn’t know where she went. After reading the letter written by Feng Qi Qi, the late emperor was completely anxious. Feng Huang had always been filial. She wouldn’t not keep in contact with her family. However, this time, even her family didn’t know where she went. The late emperor was sure that something had happened to her.
Feng Xiao was recalled by the late emperor. The late emperor passed the throne to him. He took the letters written by little master Feng Huang and began to trace the footprints of Feng Huang. In other words, the late emperor walked on the roads she walked on and drank the soup she tasted…The late emperor began from the first letter and followed the footsteps of each letter to explore the whereabouts of little master Feng Huang.
Contrary to the attitude of the late emperor, Feng Qi Qi didn’t seem the slightest bit worried about her daughter nor did she send people to search for little master Feng Huang. This was a bit unusual. I noticed it, but I didn’t tell the late emperor. I just followed him all the way. In the end, we reached Xiliang City, the former capital of Xi Qi.
At this point, Xi Qi had already become Nan Feng’s territory for many years. Returning once again to the place where we were held hostage for ten years, my heart had too many emotions.
The last letter of little master Feng Huang was sent from here. After that, there was no more news of her.
I and the late emperor took the portrait of little master Feng Huang and posted it everywhere. So, people could help find the whereabouts of little master Feng Huang. We stayed for a month.
This month, I watched the late emperor change from a mature and handsome man to someone dirty. A layer of beard grew on his clean chin which looked very decadent, dispirited and listless.
“Fu Er, I lost her.” The late emperor looked at the coming and going people in the city of Xiliang and said that to me. There was endless remorse in this statement which made me pity this emperor.
The late emperor, this involved party probably wasn’t aware that his love for her had changed long ago from the love of an elder for the younger generation to a love between a man and a woman. It was said that the person on the spot is baffled, the onlooker sees clear. Although, I was an onlooker, but I couldn’t say anything.
The person on the spot is baffled, the onlooker sees clear. The not involved party sees more of the situation.
“Uncle, this is something a sister asked me to give you.”
Just when the late emperor fell into loneliness once again, a child with a teapot hairstyle, stuffed a note to the late emperor and then ran away laughingly.
I don’t know when I saw this scene, I suddenly felt that hope was coming. Before I reacted, the late emperor already ran away regardless of his image.
I was old and really couldn’t keep up with the late emperor. I could only hire a carriage and chased. When I caught up with the late emperor, we had come to a lake. A small boat was parked on the shore. It seemed to be waiting for us.
When we went by boat to the big boat in the middle of the lake, a sound of zither came over. At that time, I clearly saw that the hand of the late emperor began to tremble. Only she could play such a beautiful music.
As a qualified servant, I didn’t follow the late emperor. Instead, I left this place for them.
However, even so, I heard little master Feng Huang’s voice. I swear that I only heard two sentences. Those sentences said this.
“In the past, you met my mother on this boat and fell in love with her. Now, you met me here, can you also love me once?”
What happened after that, I don’t know. Even if you question me intensely, I don’t know what had happened. Forgive me for being an old man. Old people forget easily. I don’t remember many, many things anymore.
Maybe, you will say that I was playing the fool. Then, you are very right! As a servant who lived for sixty years in the palace, to be able to live, there must be a way to survive and keep his life. For example I, I know what I should and shouldn’t say. I also know when I should understand things and when I should play the fool.
I can only tell you that after this, the late emperor accompanied little master Feng Huang to the Number on village under Heavens in Yongzhou. I am old. The late emperor was compassionate. He didn’t let me follow. As for what had happened there, I don’t know.
What I do know is that the ending of this story is cliché. The late emperor and little master Feng Huang lived happily together. Everyone one, including I, this old eunuch who couldn’t get any older, lived happily.