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Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

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Chapter 74: Live

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Chapter 74: Live

Chapter 74: Live In order to attract the audience, both teams brought out their best skills, such as speaking lines, learning Peking opera, storytelling, quick-paced storytelling, etc. Qin Xiaoxian's embarrassment was obvious at this time. He knew too little and just stood there like a wooden stake. Things got better after he started performing crosstalk. He performed a simple piece of "Couplet", but there wasn't much applause. On the other hand, Qi Long's group performed the "Couplet" act, which Qi Long explained to Yue Yunpeng and made the performance fresh. The two of them are considered the king bomb combination in this group, and most of the old men and women are more familiar with them! After coming on stage, Yue Yunpeng came up with the first line of the couplet: "If you are not full, eat the crab's feet. If you are full, it is still not enough!" "I'll give you a pair of buttocks that hurt when you ride a donkey. Riding a donkey's buttocks will also hurt when you ride a donkey's buttocks!" Qi Long replied. Yue Yunpeng waved his hands and said with his unique sly smile: "No! My word 'still' means 'throw', which is a verb." "What do you mean?" "The first half of the sentence says that if you haven't eaten enough crabs, you should eat the crab legs. Crab legs are also called crab feet, but crab legs are divided into claws and walking legs. What I mean is that after eating the claws, you should throw away the walking legs!" Yue Yunpeng explained. Qi Long was puzzled: "How come your family has a mine? You eat crabs but not legs?"

"Don't worry about it. I'll just eat it. If I don't have enough crab, I'll eat the crab legs. If I eat the legs, I'll throw away the legs! It doesn't make sense, does it?" Qi Long thought for a while and said, "Who said I can't get it right? I still say this: riding a donkey hurts your butt, riding a donkey hurts your butt, and riding a donkey hurts your butt!" "Does this fit?" “That’s right!” "My throw is a verb!" "This is also a verb, it's just a return!" "My foot is a noun, how do you say your buttocks?" "This is an ink stick, one of the four treasures of the study. Top calligraphers use ink sticks, which are ground in an inkstone with water to make ink for writing. I borrowed your master's ink stick and am returning it on my donkey!" "This is called: riding a donkey's butt hurts, riding a donkey's butt hurts, riding a donkey's butt hurts, and returning the ink stick with the butt!" Yue Yunpeng asked a tricky question, and Qi Long cleverly solved it with the same sentence. The audience was so excited that they cheered and threw out the Douxiaoshe medals. The trump cards on the other side were Gao Dongqiang and Shaobing. The two of them performed a "Diaoyan Pian" which, like "Speaking Talkatively", was a classic comedy show that relied on beating up their partners to create laughter. The two of them incorporated the exchange of praise and teasing from "On Praise and Teasing" into the show. Shaobing hit Dongqiang first, and Dongqiang kept holding back at first. Later, in his capacity as a senior brother of the "Jiu" class in the variety show, he said to Shaobing, a disciple of the "Xiao" class in the variety show, that some aspects of his performance were not good enough, and he said, "Let me demonstrate to you." Then he took revenge by hitting Shaobing in return. The loud hitting sound made the audience laugh so hard that they couldn't stop and gave him a medal. Each side performed four or five crosstalk segments with relatively thin punchlines, and this ended the street showdown. After the end, all ten team members looked exhausted. Gao Dongqiang concluded: "From this we can see why crosstalk colleagues on the same street wanted to kill each other in the past!" As soon as these words were spoken, everyone started laughing. Of course not. There are only so many audiences on the street. If they go to see your show, won’t my show be empty soon? Qi Long continued, "We are still considered lucky. In the past, our crosstalk veterans did not compete with crosstalk troupes on the street, but with more lively performances such as opera troupes, acrobatics, and martial arts. Compared with these arts that are already lively and entertaining, those without any talent would definitely starve to death and would not make any money!" "After experiencing this, you will know how lucky we are now. There are microphones in the theater. Here, I have to shout with my voice. I have drunk four bottles of water!" Even Shaobing, who was so noisy, felt tired of speaking with his voice alone.

Everyone had their own feelings about how difficult it was to perform crosstalk in the past. Compared to the environment they are in now, there is really a world of difference. The production team counted the medals. The difference between the two teams was not much, but Qi Long and Yue Yunpeng's team was still better. The rankings of the five people rose collectively. Zhang Helun immediately showed off and asked Gao Dongqiang to call him uncle. After Gao Dongqiang called him uncle, he said: "The camera is off, don't leave!" Zhang Helun ran away, and the recording of this variety show ended. That night, Qi Long, who had the highest seniority in this issue, was asked to assign a partner. He did not choose Gao Dongqiang, but Qin Xiaoxian. It was seen during the previous street performances that Xiao Qin still knew too little. Lao Guo had more and more apprentices, and he didn't teach much when it came to Jiu Zi. As his uncle, he planned to pass on his skills to Qin Xiaoxian and teach him a traditional piece. "How about we do a Sheep Climbing a Tree?" This is a classic ethical gag program, and it is very appropriate to use it in a variety show where the uncle is one generation older than the nephew. Qin Xiaoxian naturally let Qi Long make the decision. That night, Qin Xiaoxian came to Qi Long's house, and Qi Long told him about this job. "I will say that in the free country of Texas, sheep were found climbing trees. The governor said anyone who knows this will be given $600,000. I said I'm not interested, and you said you are interested. Then I will let you play my son and tell you why sheep can climb trees!" Qi Long particularly emphasized that he had to pretend to be interested in the 600,000 Dadao Le and accept it for the sake of money. "Six hundred thousand?" Qin Xiaoxian scratched his head: "Uncle, isn't it a little too little? Is the character established?" Qi Long:. I forgot, this guy is also a rich second-generation. His family runs a hotel chain. He drives a Maserati to Deyun Club to perform crosstalk. He was once interviewed on the street. A reporter asked him what he could do with 160,000 yuan. His answer was nothing. It seems that in one performance, his character was to play poor and pretend to be poor. He said that he was so poor that he only had 1,000 yuan in pocket money a week. Wouldn’t the character you want to establish collapse immediately? "Then it's six million. Anyway, you have to show interest!" Qi Long changed the words. After the performance, Qi Long asked him to memorize his lines carefully, and when seeing him off, he reminded him of the importance of character setting on the crosstalk stage. Once the character setting you want to establish on the crosstalk stage collapses, it will be a stage accident and the whole show will fail. When preparing for work in the future, ask your partner Sun Jiuxiang more often whether these things that enhance the character are reasonable or not. Qin Xiaoxian expressed his gratitude and left Qi Long's house. Qi Long sat down and thought to himself that if his character on the crosstalk stage collapsed, it would at most be considered a stage accident, but if his character in the entertainment industry collapsed, then his acting career would basically be over. What about setting up a single persona, only to find out that your girlfriend is constantly cheating on you? You set up a simple personality, but then you find yourself trying all kinds of ways to grab the C position. Everyone else on the stage is wearing white, but you insist on wearing black. Let’s not create these messy characters. If we have to describe the character, there are only four words: crosstalk actor. By the way, Brother Qian’s personality is not easy to collapse. He smokes, drinks, and perms his hair. The more he smokes, the more stable his personality is. Brother Qian’s reputation is about to collapse. It must be that he is sick and the doctor has warned him not to smoke or drink. At the same time, he cannot perm his hair because all his hair has fallen out. Hahaha! The couplet comes from an answer from a netizen named [黄金开开笑] on Xhu, which I find very interesting. Also, since I have written the article about writers, I would like to ask for recommendation votes and monthly votes. It’s the end of the month now. If you have any monthly votes or recommendation votes that you haven’t had time to send, please give them to me. Thank you all!   (End of this chapter)

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