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Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

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Chapter 74: Live

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Completed
Replay 07: Opening the Temple of Learning

I asked Riemann to prove his conjecture himself, and asked Einstein and Bohr to discuss the century-long dispute again.I called on John von Neumann to redefine computers and Robert Noyce to improve semiconductor materials.Lu Shan: If you can’t figure out the seven-digit lottery code, what use do I need your proofs for?Many academic masters: We can make you a super academic master and a top scientist. How about building a neuron quantum supercomputer, a micro-nuclear battery with a battery life of 10,000 kilometers, and then rubbing nuclear fusion by hand to create a new era of mankind that has never been seen before?Lu Shan: It’s settled!Clay Mathematics Institute: Lu Shan single-handedly proved all the difficult mathematical problems that have persisted for thousands of years!Nobel Prize Organizing Committee: Why is Lu Shan the nominee for all three science awards?The New York Times: Lu Shan! Changed the history of human development.Time Magazine: This man has a monopoly on the world's most advanced technology.Lu Shan: Accumulate academic and technological points, open the Temple of Science, summon the spirits of scientists, gather the top wisdom of all mankind, and change the world!(This book is a black technology academic article) Novel keywords: Back to the 07th: Opening the Temple of Learning without pop-up window, Back to the 07th: Opening the Temple of Learning txt full download, Back to the 07th: Opening the Temple of Learning latest chapter reading

Ongoing
On the first day of military training, the iceberg school beauty came to deliver water

During the holiday after the college entrance examination, Lu Li met a good brother online.The two of them played various games together every day, sent each other beautiful 2D pictures, and chatted about everything.On the day when the college entrance examination results were announced, Lu Li got admitted to Jiangnan University, where his good brother studied, as he wished.On the first day of military training, Lu Li, who was about to be burned silly by the scorching sun, sent a message to his good brother."Godfather, please send me a cup of iced milk tea during the military training tomorrow!""Wait for me at the playground, big boy!"The next day, Jiang Lianxue, the most beautiful girl on campus at Jiangnan University, the ice goddess with a slim waist and long legs, appeared on the playground drinking milk tea.Then, in front of the shocked gazes of the freshmen, she walked up to Lu Li and handed him the half-drunk milk tea."Here, I brought some iced milk tea. Drink it, my dear son~"

Completed
You abandoned me first, now I'm a demon, why are you crying?

Ye Ling traveled through a parallel world and made a contract with a beautiful school beauty.Together they transformed into Kamen Rider W.But by chance, the school belle found another person who was more compatible with her, and without hesitation, she immediately abandoned Ye Ling.And make the matter public.Relying on his influence, Ye Ling became a hated figure in the entire knight world overnight.However, Ye Ling didn't care at all.Instead, he silently took out the Zi-O Driver from his arms.Zi-O summons the first-order Endless Knight.The second stage of Zi-O masters time and space.The Supreme King of Time summons endless knights, and one person is all the knights!The power of the devil is flashing, the world is in my hands!Countless years later.Monsters are invading wantonly, countless knights are unable to resist, beautiful school beauties are repeatedly defeated, and humanity is in danger.At this moment, a terrifying red-gold light emerged.Blessing moment, the most benevolent, kind and supreme demon king, the King of Demon Time!At this moment, the beautiful school beauty burst into tears on the spot.Ask for forgiveness.But Ye Ling pushed her away and gave her a final moment: "You abandoned me first, and now I have become a demon, why are you crying?" Novel keywords: You abandoned me first, I became a demon, why are you crying? No pop-up window, You abandoned me first, I became a demon, why are you crying? txt full download, You abandoned me first, I became a demon, why are you crying? latest chapter reading

Ongoing
After rebirth, start to do whatever you want

"My god, you call this sitting still?"……People will eventually be trapped throughout their lives by the things they could not obtain when they were young.Boss Chen, the winner in life, had to return to his youth before he had time to enjoy life.Chen Yu: Now that I have a new life, I will make up for my regrets and spend my time on the most precious people and things.This book is also known as "Why are they so different?", "Girlfriend, listen to my excuses", "Brother, she took the initiative", and "A collection of dog-licking defenses"Novel keywords: After rebirth, I started to do whatever I want without pop-up windows, After rebirth, I started to do whatever I want txt full download, After rebirth, I started to do whatever I want latest chapter reading

Ongoing
Developing the Northwest Starts with Seeds

An accident brought Guo Yang back to 2002 and he acquired a seed store.Seed stores can obtain natural energy from users' restoration of the ecological environment.By consuming natural energy, you can purchase and customize a variety of seeds.Henceforth:The Gobi Desert is reclaimed and the desert becomes an oasis;Saline-alkali land transformation, scientific research and breeding;Continuous farms, rumbling machinery...An international agricultural giant is rapidly rising from the Northwest.

Ongoing
Where is the coach's clutch? You should ask the sad and happy

Jia Xinghe traveled to a parallel world and found himself participating in a reality show, where he was randomly drawn to work as a driving school instructor.Jia Xinghe: "Do you see the tree in front?"Student: “I saw it!”Jia Xinghe: “Bump into it!”Student: “Ah?! This is not good.”Jia Xinghe: "Why don't you step on the brakes?"Student: “Where is the brake?”Jia Xinghe: "The brakes are in the Western Regions, the grapes there are sweet!"Student: "Coach, there is a rock in front of us, how do we get past it?"Jia Xinghe: "Press F! Let's flash over there."Student: "Coach, I think I'm on the line."Jia Xinghe: "No, no, no, our line is too narrow. You should learn automatic transmission."Student: “Why?”Jia Xinghe: "You only have sorrow and joy, no separation or reunion."

Ongoing
This generation of black fans is too good at buying, the top streamers are going crazy

Traveling through the parallel world of Blue Star, my popularity has collapsed?I have awakened a system, and the system has a performance card item. Can I use it to directly increase my performance?Fans:"Haha, it's good for this dead scum to collapse. People like him should be forgotten!""No, how come this scumbag's album has sold over 9 million copies? Are you sick? Why are you buying his album even though you've stopped being his fan?""No, the online store opened by the dead scumbag is selling like hotcakes? All of them are bought by fans? What kind of brainless fans are you? Get out!""Ah, his box office has exceeded 5 billion again? People in the industry are saying that he has the most fans?""What happened to your promise to stop being a fan and hate him forever? Is this how you hate him!??" Novel keywords: This generation of black fans is too good at buying, the top flow of the collapsed house is killing crazy without pop-up windows, this generation of black fans is too good at buying, the top flow of the collapsed house is killing crazy txt full download, this generation of black fans is too good at buying, the top flow of the collapsed house is killing crazy latest chapter reading

Ongoing
Letting You Broadcast Live As A Favorite Fan Turned Out To Be The God Of Death?

Traveling through parallel worlds, Lin Yi has become a rising star.It was arranged to participate in a reality show, and the fans were favored on the spot.Accidentally activated the system, but saw ominous omens on passers-by.[Little couple drunk and drove, 100% died in a car accident! 】[Bear child to die, accidental death 100%! 】Good guy!He is a favorite fan, you are the god of death!Unconvinced, various Internet celebrities challenged Lin Yi.In the end, Lin Yi advised them to eat and drink well, and be nice to themselves!Not surprisingly, it all went wrong."Misfortune came from heaven. A certain anchor was eating in a restaurant, but was rushed in by a big truck!""A second-tier actress died suddenly and unexpectedly because of a silk scarf while driving...""The fugitive gangster provoked the police, but was shot by a stray bullet..."As each piece of news hit the hot search, the company wanted to cry but had no tears.Don't cut it anymore, the company can't afford it!

Ongoing
My Live Broadcast Sucks, If I Earn Enough 200, I Will Download It!

Jiang Feng traveled to a parallel world, and awakened to screw up the live broadcast system.As long as the gift received in the live broadcast reaches 200 yuan, it will be directly and automatically downloaded, and a mysterious gift bag can be obtained.Thus, the most distressing anchor on the entire network was born.A love song, just about to reach its climax, the host has already downloaded it? Please come back tomorrow?? ? ? ? ? Question marks across the web.As soon as the game is played, Liushen Zhuang is about to blow the horn of counterattack, and the whole network is looking forward to it.As a result, the anchor went down the air?Netizens are so angry that they vomit blood.On a date with a beautiful woman, all the clothes are taken off, the atmosphere is ready, and the audience on the whole network is ready to pay to watch.The host is off the air?Netizen: "Please don't give gifts to that b, he is really rich and really broadcasts!"

Ongoing
I Became The Villain In A Novel

Time travel and become the villain of the novel?Now that I'm here, there's nothing wrong with the protagonist!I, Jiang Hao, will counterattack. Now the plot only needs to revolve around me!

Ongoing
Huanxi: The Villain Becomes Stronger, Xiaomeng Gets Drunk At The Beginning

Jiang Chen has traveled to the world of joy and obtained the villain system, as long as he suppresses the protagonist, he can become stronger."Ding! The host ruined Fang Yifan's unrequited love, reward: a top-equipped Mercedes-Benz big G.""Ding! The host gave Qiao Weidong a beautiful little hat, and the reward: a house in Scholarly Garden.""Ding! The host gave Fang Yuan a big..."From then on, a qualified villain was born.However, when Jiang Chen felt a bit lonely as an expert, he suddenly discovered that this is not just a world of joy.Jiang Lai, Lin Miaomiao, Han Fei...Before he knew it, Jiang Chen had already stood at the apex.

Ongoing
Reborn, back to a small county town to become a wealthy family

After graduating from university, Luo Yang stayed in Shanghai to work.However, after returning to his hometown to attend a high school reunion, Luo Yang became mentally unbalanced.Most of the students who stayed in their hometown to develop their careers found themselves in easy industries. Although they earned less than 10,000 yuan a month, they enjoyed a nine-to-five life with two days off a week.They drive cars worth hundreds of thousands of dollars, go fishing, get together, and go on family self-driving tours when they have free time...Luo Yang couldn't help but sigh that if he was given another chance to choose, after graduating from university, he would return to his hometown to develop and become a wealthy family in a small county town. Novel keywords: Reborn, Return to a Small County to Become a Wealthy Family without pop-up window, Reborn, Return to a Small County to Become a Wealthy Family txt full download, Reborn, Return to a Small County to Become a Wealthy Family latest chapter reading

Chapter 74: Live

Chapter 74: Live In order to attract the audience, both teams brought out their best skills, such as speaking lines, learning Peking opera, storytelling, quick-paced storytelling, etc. Qin Xiaoxian's embarrassment was obvious at this time. He knew too little and just stood there like a wooden stake. Things got better after he started performing crosstalk. He performed a simple piece of "Couplet", but there wasn't much applause. On the other hand, Qi Long's group performed the "Couplet" act, which Qi Long explained to Yue Yunpeng and made the performance fresh. The two of them are considered the king bomb combination in this group, and most of the old men and women are more familiar with them! After coming on stage, Yue Yunpeng came up with the first line of the couplet: "If you are not full, eat the crab's feet. If you are full, it is still not enough!" "I'll give you a pair of buttocks that hurt when you ride a donkey. Riding a donkey's buttocks will also hurt when you ride a donkey's buttocks!" Qi Long replied. Yue Yunpeng waved his hands and said with his unique sly smile: "No! My word 'still' means 'throw', which is a verb." "What do you mean?" "The first half of the sentence says that if you haven't eaten enough crabs, you should eat the crab legs. Crab legs are also called crab feet, but crab legs are divided into claws and walking legs. What I mean is that after eating the claws, you should throw away the walking legs!" Yue Yunpeng explained. Qi Long was puzzled: "How come your family has a mine? You eat crabs but not legs?"

"Don't worry about it. I'll just eat it. If I don't have enough crab, I'll eat the crab legs. If I eat the legs, I'll throw away the legs! It doesn't make sense, does it?" Qi Long thought for a while and said, "Who said I can't get it right? I still say this: riding a donkey hurts your butt, riding a donkey hurts your butt, and riding a donkey hurts your butt!" "Does this fit?" “That’s right!” "My throw is a verb!" "This is also a verb, it's just a return!" "My foot is a noun, how do you say your buttocks?" "This is an ink stick, one of the four treasures of the study. Top calligraphers use ink sticks, which are ground in an inkstone with water to make ink for writing. I borrowed your master's ink stick and am returning it on my donkey!" "This is called: riding a donkey's butt hurts, riding a donkey's butt hurts, riding a donkey's butt hurts, and returning the ink stick with the butt!" Yue Yunpeng asked a tricky question, and Qi Long cleverly solved it with the same sentence. The audience was so excited that they cheered and threw out the Douxiaoshe medals. The trump cards on the other side were Gao Dongqiang and Shaobing. The two of them performed a "Diaoyan Pian" which, like "Speaking Talkatively", was a classic comedy show that relied on beating up their partners to create laughter. The two of them incorporated the exchange of praise and teasing from "On Praise and Teasing" into the show. Shaobing hit Dongqiang first, and Dongqiang kept holding back at first. Later, in his capacity as a senior brother of the "Jiu" class in the variety show, he said to Shaobing, a disciple of the "Xiao" class in the variety show, that some aspects of his performance were not good enough, and he said, "Let me demonstrate to you." Then he took revenge by hitting Shaobing in return. The loud hitting sound made the audience laugh so hard that they couldn't stop and gave him a medal. Each side performed four or five crosstalk segments with relatively thin punchlines, and this ended the street showdown. After the end, all ten team members looked exhausted. Gao Dongqiang concluded: "From this we can see why crosstalk colleagues on the same street wanted to kill each other in the past!" As soon as these words were spoken, everyone started laughing. Of course not. There are only so many audiences on the street. If they go to see your show, won’t my show be empty soon? Qi Long continued, "We are still considered lucky. In the past, our crosstalk veterans did not compete with crosstalk troupes on the street, but with more lively performances such as opera troupes, acrobatics, and martial arts. Compared with these arts that are already lively and entertaining, those without any talent would definitely starve to death and would not make any money!" "After experiencing this, you will know how lucky we are now. There are microphones in the theater. Here, I have to shout with my voice. I have drunk four bottles of water!" Even Shaobing, who was so noisy, felt tired of speaking with his voice alone.

Everyone had their own feelings about how difficult it was to perform crosstalk in the past. Compared to the environment they are in now, there is really a world of difference. The production team counted the medals. The difference between the two teams was not much, but Qi Long and Yue Yunpeng's team was still better. The rankings of the five people rose collectively. Zhang Helun immediately showed off and asked Gao Dongqiang to call him uncle. After Gao Dongqiang called him uncle, he said: "The camera is off, don't leave!" Zhang Helun ran away, and the recording of this variety show ended. That night, Qi Long, who had the highest seniority in this issue, was asked to assign a partner. He did not choose Gao Dongqiang, but Qin Xiaoxian. It was seen during the previous street performances that Xiao Qin still knew too little. Lao Guo had more and more apprentices, and he didn't teach much when it came to Jiu Zi. As his uncle, he planned to pass on his skills to Qin Xiaoxian and teach him a traditional piece. "How about we do a Sheep Climbing a Tree?" This is a classic ethical gag program, and it is very appropriate to use it in a variety show where the uncle is one generation older than the nephew. Qin Xiaoxian naturally let Qi Long make the decision. That night, Qin Xiaoxian came to Qi Long's house, and Qi Long told him about this job. "I will say that in the free country of Texas, sheep were found climbing trees. The governor said anyone who knows this will be given $600,000. I said I'm not interested, and you said you are interested. Then I will let you play my son and tell you why sheep can climb trees!" Qi Long particularly emphasized that he had to pretend to be interested in the 600,000 Dadao Le and accept it for the sake of money. "Six hundred thousand?" Qin Xiaoxian scratched his head: "Uncle, isn't it a little too little? Is the character established?" Qi Long:. I forgot, this guy is also a rich second-generation. His family runs a hotel chain. He drives a Maserati to Deyun Club to perform crosstalk. He was once interviewed on the street. A reporter asked him what he could do with 160,000 yuan. His answer was nothing. It seems that in one performance, his character was to play poor and pretend to be poor. He said that he was so poor that he only had 1,000 yuan in pocket money a week. Wouldn’t the character you want to establish collapse immediately? "Then it's six million. Anyway, you have to show interest!" Qi Long changed the words. After the performance, Qi Long asked him to memorize his lines carefully, and when seeing him off, he reminded him of the importance of character setting on the crosstalk stage. Once the character setting you want to establish on the crosstalk stage collapses, it will be a stage accident and the whole show will fail. When preparing for work in the future, ask your partner Sun Jiuxiang more often whether these things that enhance the character are reasonable or not. Qin Xiaoxian expressed his gratitude and left Qi Long's house. Qi Long sat down and thought to himself that if his character on the crosstalk stage collapsed, it would at most be considered a stage accident, but if his character in the entertainment industry collapsed, then his acting career would basically be over. What about setting up a single persona, only to find out that your girlfriend is constantly cheating on you? You set up a simple personality, but then you find yourself trying all kinds of ways to grab the C position. Everyone else on the stage is wearing white, but you insist on wearing black. Let’s not create these messy characters. If we have to describe the character, there are only four words: crosstalk actor. By the way, Brother Qian’s personality is not easy to collapse. He smokes, drinks, and perms his hair. The more he smokes, the more stable his personality is. Brother Qian’s reputation is about to collapse. It must be that he is sick and the doctor has warned him not to smoke or drink. At the same time, he cannot perm his hair because all his hair has fallen out. Hahaha! The couplet comes from an answer from a netizen named [黄金开开笑] on Xhu, which I find very interesting. Also, since I have written the article about writers, I would like to ask for recommendation votes and monthly votes. It’s the end of the month now. If you have any monthly votes or recommendation votes that you haven’t had time to send, please give them to me. Thank you all!   (End of this chapter)

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