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Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

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Chapter 39: Koreans must say that crosstalk was invented by them

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Ongoing
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Chapter 39: Koreans must say that crosstalk was invented by them

Chapter 39: Koreans must say that crosstalk was invented by them Qi Long and Gao Dongqiang's video quick-paced counterattack drew unanimous applause from netizens. Dong Lusheng was so angry that he posted another Weibo post, saying what the hell was the quick-paced singing they were doing? Netizens responded with its own words: Do you understand clapper talk? Just comment on clapper talk! Gao Dongqiang laughed when he saw it: "He's anxious! This clown is anxious!" "Actually, people who post outrageous comments on the Internet are either stupid or bad, or both. They might be happy right now because we've increased their popularity!" "Then he won't be happy because his trending search has dropped and other trending searches have come up!" Gao Dongqiang said with a smile. Hot search terms soaring: "Let's Pay Attention Together" has really changed! When I clicked on it, I saw that the video was a report by Zhu Guangquan from "Let's Pay Attention Together". He was reporting a video of a panda hugging its thigh, and he used rhymes repeatedly while reporting. "I'll cross thousands of mountains and rivers, even if it means walking from south to north, I just want to hug the breeder's thighs. I feel so happy in my heart, so cute that you can't find the north, and you can't stop smiling from ear to ear." The sign language teacher below was naturally translating the sign language with a helpless look on his face. Audiences who have watched the finals of the crosstalk competition will naturally think of the scenes of Qi Long and Gao Dongqiang in the competition, with their rhyming broadcasts and sign language seals, just as Zhu Guangquan said in the video: I was so happy that I couldn't stop smiling. “You really changed it!” "It's definitely a lot more fun, and the sign language teacher looks helpless!"

"Qi Long will be beaten by the sign language teacher when he goes to CCTV, right?" "If you want to broadcast it like this, I'll watch it every day!" “I look forward to the quick-talking stories in the Focus Interview, the Jingdong drums in the sports shows, and the pop songs in the weather forecast.” This popularity soon overshadowed Dong Lu. The audience who watched the crosstalk competition went to read the "Watch Together" entry, so who would care about him? For the Beichuncheng crosstalk commercial performance, Qi Long and Gao Dongqiang still prepared the crosstalk "Full of Knowledge" that they performed in the competition. Although the foundation and the main work are the same, offline performances are not as strict as those on TV. First, the time does not need to be so precise, so you can talk longer and add more content. Secondly, the controls are not as strict, so there are more baggage to be had. The two were the third to last to appear on stage, the second to last were the head coaches Gao Feng and Luan Yunping, and the last to appear was the Yue Yue combination who led the team this time. The reason why it is the third from the last is because the second from the last is mainly responsible for controlling the time, which is given to Gao Feng who is very good at this aspect. This guy can even perform a five-minute leg job in "Yellow Crane Tower", ensuring the length of the final performance and allowing the actors in the front to have less time pressure. The fourth pancake started with a lively atmosphere, and Zhang Helun and Lang Heyan continued to fry it. Ever since this guy was influenced by Qi Long in the small theater, he has choreographed Guo Degang in every small theater performance. He is short, dark-skinned, round-bodied, and poorly educated, and he mentions everything about them, and the effect is explosive. Guo Qilin's partner Yan Hexiang was also affected. When performing the segment of "Entrusting Wife and Son", when Guo Qilin said that their family was in a bad state, Yan Hexiang seized the opportunity to fight back fiercely: "Great, it's so satisfying!" "Relieve your hatred? Did my father offend you? You can't make any money without my father. Tell me, how much money can you make from crosstalk now?" Yan Hexiang responded rigorously: "You have to ask whether it is before or after tax?" “Before tax?” “Those who didn’t give money before tax must pay taxes!” “Oh, what about after tax?” "I haven't been paid for several times since we slept together!" The audience was shocked. Guo Qilin panicked and quickly pushed Yan Hexiang away: "You'd better say it according to the script!" After the two of them finished their performance, it was Qi Long and Gao Dongqiang's turn to appear on stage.

As soon as he came on stage, Qi Long repeated what the two pairs of actors said before: "Don't be fooled by Yan Hexiang criticizing his master, Guo Degang, on stage. In fact, in our crosstalk industry, there is no hierarchy on stage, and new graves are built off stage." "New grave?" Gao Dongqiang grasped the key point. "Oh, that's right. The new grave is next to the old one. The owner of the old grave is Zhang Helun." I just watched the choreography by Master He Lun and then by Yan Hexiang. This joke immediately made the audience feel the funny point and started laughing. "Let them both go down and kneel for a while, uh, rest for a while. It's our turn to come up and give you another speech. As you all know, I am a cultural person, uh, although my attainments are not as good as Teacher Gao, but I also have my own research direction!" When he said the wrong thing, Qi Long glanced at Gao Dongqiang with a small expression. When Gao Dongqiang was about to interrupt, Qi Long immediately corrected him and shook him. It's the same joke told in a different way. The charm of crosstalk lies in its different ways. The same joke can be presented in a novel form, leaving the audience unable to guess. This is the real skill. "What do you study?" "I'm quite knowledgeable about the origin of this surname! Just come to any random person and tell him a surname, and I'll know what kind of historical allusions there are before his surname, and why they have this surname?!" "Oh? Then tell me about me!" Gao Dongqiang looked unconvinced. "What is your last name?" "My last name is Gao!" "There are many surnames like Gao. Let's talk about the first one, which is the national surname. In the past, there was a country called Goguryeo on a peninsula not far from our Beichun City. Many people took the first character of their country's name as their surname, Gao!" Qi Long showed off. Gao Dongqiang nodded in agreement: "Oh, you know what, it really is true!" "But Mr. Gao, your last name definitely didn't come from there. (The voice suddenly got louder) Even if it did, it couldn't be that!" "You scared me. Why?" "Wow, think about it, as the champion of the National Crosstalk Competition, you are the middle class in the crosstalk world." "I'm just in the middle of the pack?" "There are two more words at the end. I forgot. Please remind me of one!" "whetstone!" "You are the middle-class bottom in the crosstalk world, the bottom!" Qi Long said with confidence, ignoring the laughter from the audience and talking to himself. Gao Dongqiang stopped him: "Wait a minute, is the word 'underpants' a compliment? The backbone of the team!" "Okay, I'm wrong again. Anyway, you are not worthless in the crosstalk world, but you are also famous (are you close to me?). You may become a crosstalk master with me in the future! (Mixed?) By then, the Korean country that claims Goguryeo as their ancestor will say that you are their bloodline, right? And then they will say that crosstalk was invented by the Korean country?" "Eh? Why does he say that?" "You don't know, the Koreans are the best at stealing other people's things and claiming they invented them. They said they invented the Dragon Boat Festival, they said they invented the noodles with soybean paste, and they even said Sun Wukong was from Korea!" "why?" "Because the Monkey King holds a stick!"

"Can this be a scam?" The joke mocking the South Korean country caused laughter in the audience! "So, your surname Gao didn't come from there. It has other origins. During the Spring and Autumn Period, there was a Duke Wen of Qi in the State of Qi. His son was called Gongzi Gao. Gongzi Gao's descendants used this Gao as their surname!" "Oh, that's the case. It makes sense! You really have done some research!" "Right, so you, whose last name is Gao, have to call me, whose last name is Qi, dad. That's reasonable, right?" "What's the point of this? You've been talking so much about this, just to make me call you dad, right?" "Look, everyone," Qi Long said, looking relieved, "It's not easy for a crosstalk artist to get his partner to call him dad!" "Go away, you are wrong. The king of Qi was named Jiang. Later, the Tian family replaced Qi and also had the surname Tian. How could he have the surname Qi? Nonsense!" "Ah? Duke Wen of Qi's surname is not Qi?" Qi Long looked surprised. The movie "Full of Knowledge" requires the comic to have only a superficial understanding of everything, and the bottle is only half full. With this change, it not only has a funny tone, but also fits the character! (End of this chapter)

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