Collapse, I just want to retire, and they want to share me Strawberry Pizza Summary: My name is Yufan, the former captain of Hyperion and current manager of Hyperion Café. The guests all praised me for being kind and enthusiastic, handsome and good-hearted, and having a happy family. I think so too. ——Until a girl kissed me in front of my wife. Um, Miss Mei, I am a family man, so please respect yourself. Miss Kiana, please don't misunderstand me, I really have no other thoughts about the person you love. Really, please believe me, I am a serious person. Wait, Ms. Kiana, where are you touching? Extra part
null New Year Extra Captain Stargazing (Part 1) The Day When the Stars and You Will Not Disappear ——That was a story that happened in the distant past, when the store manager had not yet become a store manager. "Let go! Let me go! You shameless thief!!" At nightfall, the deep shadows of the trees covered the deserted suburbs, and the sharp screams of young children reached the sky. The petite silver-haired girl was hanging upside down in the air, her pretty face blushing with shame and anger, her hands tightly holding the hem of her skirt below her waist, and her slender ankles wrapped in white silk were firmly grasped in the palm of a strong hand. It was the 73rd year of the Lunar Calendar of the Huang Empire, the ancient times when the sage king who would unify the world in later generations was still a child. The previous emperor had passed away, and the new emperor had not yet been established. At the same time, powerful enemies were at the doorstep, civil strife was breaking out, and the whole world was plunged into a tense atmosphere of confrontation. In the northern part of Huangyue City, there is a pitch-black jungle with complete silence. In this deep darkness where even the stars and the moon are blocked by the trees, there is no sign of human life except for the chirping of a few insects and animals. So naturally, the sharp cries that tear through the night will naturally not get any response from anyone. ——Except for the “shameless thief” himself who had grabbed the girl’s ankle tightly. The man held the silver-haired girl's ankles, slowly raised his arms, and squatted down slightly, allowing his eyes to meet the other's blue eyes full of shame and anger, and grinned: "I say, don't you know that this kind of cute reaction is more likely to arouse the 'shameless desires' of the 'shameless thief'?" “You, you, you—you vulgar person!!” The silver-haired girl cursed loudly. However, perhaps because her upbringing did not teach her how to curse, the aggressiveness of her words could be described as “harmless to humans and animals”. “Do you know who I am? How dare you, how dare you do such a rude thing to me!” "Hmm... a cute girl who ran into the forest alone in the middle of the night and was caught by a 'shameless thief'?" the man said with a smile. "?" "If I kidnap you right now, your Huang Empire won't be able to find you in such a vast forest." The man put on a thoughtful expression, with a hint of joy on his face. "Then I can lock you up in a small dark room and do shameful things to you day and night?" The silver-haired girl's scalp suddenly felt cold and a thin layer of goose bumps appeared on her back. "You, you, you—don't do anything rash! Aren't you afraid that you will spend the rest of your life being hunted by the imperial army?!" "I'm kidding, Mr. Huang Taisun Guanxing. If I kidnap you, the survival of the empire will probably become a matter of debate in a few years." The "shameless thief" said with a smile, "With the world-famous prime minister here, if there are only those two insignificant foreign enemies, you don't need to worry too much about the collapse of the empire. It's just... you should know better than anyone what the real enemy of the Huang Empire, or the world, is, right?" “Then why did you suddenly kidnap us?!” Guan Xing said with a dark face, “Even if you are a countryman, since you know the existence of strange beasts, you should also know that this disaster from another world is not as simple as threatening one person or one country. Even if you hide us in this forest, as long as the strange beast shows up, this forest will immediately be barren under the invasion of the strange beast, so——”
"——So, how about we make a deal?" The thief showed a sexy smile on his face. "...What do you want to discuss?" Guan Xing paused, and spoke in a slightly softer tone, "Money? Or status? If you let me go immediately, I can forgive what happened today, and I will give you everything I promised after I finish everything." "Who wants those things? I didn't expect that the crown prince Guanxing would be such a vulgar person. It's really disappointing." The thief glanced at Guanxing with contempt. "..." The situation is stronger than me, I can't bear it...!! Guanxing bit his teeth lightly and said in a deep voice: "Then what do you want?" "Alas." The thief shook his head and sighed for a long time. "Master Stargazer, you should have seen that I am just a 'rough man' who has lived outside the world for many years. Although I picked up some books that recorded common sense of language by chance, I don't know anything else, such as etiquette and moral ethics. Of course, I can't have money or anything like that, right?" "You want books that record knowledge?" "Hey..." The thief shook his head in disgust and pointed at his head. "I'm already this old. How can I still have the brain to study?" ...You don't look that old, Guanxing complained in his heart, then thought for a moment: "So you want wealth that will allow you to live the rest of your life in abundance?" "I was able to live in the mountains and forests without relying on money for the first half of my life. It's useless to ask for these things in the second half of my life." The thief said earnestly. Guan Xing looked at the thief's face suspiciously: "...Do you really only know some common sense about language? Why do I feel that your logic of language is not like that of an uneducated person?" "That's not important." The thief smiled and shook his head. "What's important is, Master Stargazer, you know that this place is so remote that no one would come here on weekdays. To be honest, you are the first living person I have seen in my life in this forest. As for me, I have lived alone in this mountain forest for more than ten years. It is highly likely that I will not meet another person who comes to this forest in the rest of my life." "So, do you think I would let go of the only girl in the world who could become my wife?" Guan Xing was extremely angry and couldn't help cursing, "You, you, you - you shameless bastard, after talking for so long you are still thinking about such shameless things! Shame on you!!!" "How can this be shameless? Mencius once said that there are three types of unfilial behavior, and the worst is to have no descendants. Continuing the family line is a normal need of human beings. Although I am a man from the mountains and have never seen my parents since I came to this world, they are still the man and woman who gave me life. Even if I can't meet them, I don't want to be unfilial to them." The thief said with a smile. "You -! How can there be such a perverted logic in this world? And how can you say that you only know languages!!" Guanxing was a little crazy, "Anyway, there is no way I can marry a shameless person like you! If you dare to force yourself, I... I I I... I won't -" "Tsk, don't reject me so quickly." The thief interrupted Guanxing's words, "Why don't you at least listen to my conditions first?" "If you want me to listen to your conditions, at least put it down first!" Guanxing stared at the thief's face with his eyes wide open. He looks quite handsome, why would he do such a horrible thing? With his appearance, if he dressed up a little and stood on the street, there would be no way that no young girls would fall in love with him! "That won't do. Who knows if you will run away if I put you down? Although it won't take much time to catch you back, I don't want to waste my time on such a meaningless thing." The thief smiled and said, "You come to be my wife, and I will guarantee that you will have no worries in the Huang Empire for a thousand years. How about it?" New Year Extra: Captain Stargazing (II) Hyperion's Log [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 1, January 1, 4:32 It has been four hours since I boarded this strange airship. I haven't been able to explore all the interior spaces of the ship yet, but judging from its appearance and the main control room that looks like a bridge, it looks very much like a ship in a game I played before coming to this world. Hyperion... How ridiculous! I've been in that world for several years, but I had to wait until the world was destroyed to figure out what the hell I had traveled to. I have almost forgotten the plot of Honkai Impact 3... There is a distorted scene outside the porthole, and I can't tell where I am at all. Anyway, before I starve to death, I should look for something to eat on the ship. I wish this ship could keep me in this damn place longer. 】 [Logbook
Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 1, January 8, 12:35 Today is the eighth day on board the ship. After spending about three days to figure out the overall picture of Hyperion, I have finally figured out how to use the ship's control system. Fortunately, the energy source of this ship is the surrounding space. Although it is a little unbelievable, during the sailing process, it can absorb the energy leaked from the surrounding sea area on its own, and that energy can be converted into various substances. I tried to use the ship's material converter and universal synthesizer to make some food. At least in the past few days, my stomach and intestines have not shown any pathological changes. However, even if I really got sick, it didn't seem to be a big deal. During the space shock not long ago, my head accidentally hit the corner of the control table. It was really painful and even broke my skin... But the next second after I was injured, my body suddenly flashed to the treatment bed in the infirmary, and the wound on my forehead healed in an instant, and I didn't even feel the treatment process. As a means of transportation, the Hyperion is truly more advanced than any other means of transportation I have ever seen. Even if it continues to sail like this, it does not seem to run into the dilemma of energy depletion. Although it feels a bit lonely to be alone in this ship, no matter what, it is always a good thing to be able to survive with life support. 】 [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 3, January 21, 16:03 After three months, I felt that my mind had become a little abnormal. There was no one to communicate with or talk to, and even the scene outside the porthole did not change at all. Fortunately, the AI of this ship was smart enough to barely regard it as a companion with which to communicate, so that I had not forgotten how to speak. Oh, when will this damn journey end? 】 [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 4, August 8, 27:8 I haven't written a diary for a while, because nothing happened... I feel like I have done everything I can do, what else can I do next? Why doesn’t this Hyperion have a human hibernation system...】 [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 17, August 7, 2:8 I suddenly realized that my body seemed to be unable to grow. This should be something that makes people happy, right? No, after all, what kind of emotion is happiness? Is my brain really still normal? 】 [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 102, August 12, 25:9 I tried to chop off my own head, but it was restored by the Hyperion healing system in the next second... Then I'll try to turn myself into a cement stake and throw it out of Hyperion. 】 [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 105, August 1, 1:12 Can’t die. 】 [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 122, August 2, 5:16 Can’t die. 】 [Logbook
Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 243, August 6, 8:17 Can’t die. 】 [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 516, August 7, 1:12 Start practicing your language skills again, otherwise you won’t be able to speak anything except the three words “can’t die”. It's really hard to bear. Although I feel that my thinking circuits are completely abnormal, the brain of this body does not make me even a psychopath. I went to the medical room for a self-examination some time ago and concluded that everything was normal... I also think that my brain is still normal, but at a time like this, being normal is more fatal. I would rather be crazy now. Go and do the AI key test questions. You won’t die anyway, and you don’t know if you will accidentally solve some difficult math problems like the Goldbach conjecture...] [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 516, August 12, 15:13 Mathematics is a wonderful thing. Then go and study the contents of other subjects. 】 [Logbook Recorded time: Hyperion calendar, year 825, August 1, 3:14 Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The view has changed!!!!!!!!!!!! The view out the porthole has changed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I actually saw a fucking world!!!!!!!!!!!! I actually saw a fucking world!!!!!!!!!!!! Wuhu!!!!!!!!!!!! There’s finally someone!!! Wow hahahahahaha!!!!!! I want to find someone to talk to! I want to meet more people!!! I want to find someone to accompany me!!!!!! No! No! Calm down! I'm a human, I'm a person, I'm still a fucking person! My mind is still normal now, I can't do something that I will regret in the future, calm down! Calm down! What kind of world is this? Is this one of the ones I recorded when I first boarded the Hyperion? ! The fastest landing time will take two hours, which is enough! It is more than enough for me to make full preparations! Remember, Captain! Remember, Yufan! You are very strong! Very strong! You will not die even if your body is immersed in the quantum sea! You must have a clear understanding of yourself, and you must not let this world panic! You must not let this world reject you! If possible, you must obtain permanent residency in this world! It’s okay if you really can’t get permanent residency! In short, you must never let yourself return to being alone for eight hundred years! It’s best to find someone who is willing to accompany you for a lifetime! Who is willing to accompany you for a lifetime? That’s not important, think about it after landing! As long as there is someone who may accompany you for a lifetime, you must never miss it! Remember, cast a wide net! Don’t put all your eggs in one basket! World! Your Captain is coming! ! ! ! ! ! 】 New Year Extra Captain Stargazing (Part 3) The Day When the Stars and You Will Not Disappear The captain's first meeting with Guanxing can be said to have been spent in suspicion and vigilance. In fact, there was no way not to be on guard. Not to mention that she was a cute little girl, even if he was a grown man, if he was suddenly lifted up by the ankles in the dark forest, without any resistance, he would probably feel a chill on his back and a tightening of his anus... For the sake of chastity and life safety, showing weakness temporarily is probably the most rational choice at this time. However, after hearing the shameless little thief's words that could be described as arrogant, Guanxing, who has always been rational and intelligent, couldn't help revealing a mocking expression. "Guarantee that our Huang Empire will be worry-free for a thousand years? You are so arrogant! If you can really guarantee that our Huang Empire will be prosperous and peaceful for a thousand years, then as the grandson of the contemporary emperor, what's the harm in me marrying you?" She desperately held down the hem of her skirt, which Newton could not help but show a look of relief. The shame and anger on her face had not yet completely faded, but the corners of her mouth slightly raised a hint of sarcasm and disdain: "But you, thief, do you really know what a thousand years is? A person's life span is only a few decades. People over seventy are already old, not to mention the centenarians who no longer know how to wear clothes or eat. A thousand years? Humph, do you think you are an immortal who lives in seclusion in the mountains?" "Immortal?" The thief was stunned for a moment, then immediately shook his head in fear and trepidation, "No, no, no, I'm not an immortal. I'm just a bachelor who's anxious to find a wife." "Then why don't you go to the capital to look for one?! Huangyue City is not far to the south! I see that you are a thief with extraordinary skills and handsome looks. If you want to find a wife, why don't you just ask a beautiful girl to come and propose marriage? If you are worried that you are a country bumpkin with no background, then let us be your background. Although your style of doing things is very weird, we have to admit that with your conditions, if you go to each family to propose marriage, there will always be a young girl who will be interested in you!" The thief was a little embarrassed for some reason: "I, I did look for them, but none of them agreed. They also said that if they really wanted to marry me, I had to fulfill the conditions of my promise..." Guan Xing was stunned at first, then he immediately flew into a rage: "Does that mean we can agree to it? You shameless bastard! You've already proposed to other girls, and you're still looking for us, right?!!"
The thief scratched his head and said frankly, "I just think that a girl who would run alone into the deep mountains and forests on such a dark day must be mentally unstable. Maybe she can also accept me, who is also not normal." "Who are you calling mentally ill?!" Guanxing couldn't bear it any longer. She angrily moved her hands away from the hem of her skirt and slapped the young face in front of her with all her strength without holding back.